Described as a person with the emotional range of a brick wall, a perception weirder than that of a human high on LSD and magic mushrooms. 
Cooler than the other side of the pillow and hotter than a midsummer sun.
An egotistical @#$!*%#!.<">#$!*%#!.">@#$!*%#!.</a> Often seen jumping from buildings and causing snowstorms, I have been known to build large suspension bridges on my lunch breaks then obliterate them before dinner. I don't perspire, I inspire. 
I have performed open heart surgery in the middle of the Amazon jungle, with one arm tied behind my back, and the patient ...... was me. 

I have wooed the hearts of many and made Juliet fall out of love with Romeo. 
I once made a transparent window opaque by sheer will power.
When I'm bored I make mountains erupt then race with the rubble to the base...I have yet to lose.
My arrogance rivals that of Napoleon Bonaparte and my generosity beats jolly old saint Nicks.

I accidentally sneezed in a large building and now it is called the "Leaning tower of Pisa" 
I sleep once a month; when I do sleep it's with one eye open. I single handedly  destroyed the Spartan race.

and best of all I can get the USB in on the first try!!!!!

(None of this was serious just some good fun)