RimuruEdward6
Hi you not long ago placed a message that you didn’t know if your writing was any good so I went to the story and took the time to read the first few chapters and if you are interested I have some prows and cons if you are interested
The thing that truly could help you with minimal adjustment in your writing is that you tell sometimes things twice which makes it repetitive like x groep reacts character A says character B says etc you don’t have to announce that those groups of people will do something just go directly to the character actions and dialogue which you do just make sure you won’t announce unnecessary
Sometimes the spacing feels a bit awkward maybe if you can remove the spacing between character dialogue and the lines you use for the sentences where you announce what a character says it would read more naturally
Though I can say your strong in making sentences feel more alive by changing tone of dialogue for what you are trying to convey
I hope I helped you out with that and don’t forget writing down your own words to have fun is the most importent thing and if you disagree then that’s fine as well I don’t want to downplay your writing but genuinely want you to be able to write the best way you want to write but on the end of the day it’s your choice to write what you want to write
