mariawwe_
What's great about this story is that I feel that everyone at some point had to deal with something similar. I hope this story touches your heart. https://www.wattpad.com/story/90461380
mariawwe_
mariawwe_
It's been months since I last been on here. Things are changing a lot. I graduated almost two months ago from high school. Just last Friday, a day after my birthday I moved out and moved in with my brother to Fairfield. It's hard adjusting to this new setting. Ever since I moved in I haven't really gone out much and I have doing my best efforts in looking for a job. My brother keeps stalling on it. It's getting quite frustrating. But anyway, I'm starting to feel a bit disconnected. I've been surrounded by only 4 walls while my brother is away working. It's hard adjusting.
mariawwe_
@SmartieGogo Awe! You're so understanding! If and when you can let me know when you can facetime
mariawwe_
I'll be heading to San Jose on April 16th for Admitted Spartan Day! YES! YES! YES!
mariawwe_
I got accepted to San Jose State and of course East Bay. I am beyond undecided of where I want to go. Oh decisions!
mariawwe_
FYI I got accepted to my number one choice! This means I get to pursue my dreams!
mariawwe_
Males are 5 years IMMATURE
Females are 5 years MATURE.
-My Instructor
mariawwe_
"Rage, rage, rage."
I feel like a monster.
mariawwe_
I talked to my counselor and how I've been feeling lately. I told her I've been feeling some kind of dark anger. A deep disgust but that by the end of the day I feel sad. Very sad. She says I have depression. And I don't want to be depressed. It's the worst feeling in the world. I don't know how to deal with it. I hate it. I don't want to feel like this. It scares me.
advice would help.
Thanks
-Maria the Misfit
metconeprac
@mariawwe_ Alright, it will be incredibly easier for you to deal with this when you have educated help. Having a counselor is something I wanted but never reached out for when I was bad which made things WORSE. I became reserved so much so that I started internalizing my feelings in a NEGATIVE way and this is something you should not do. So talk it out. I know it's incredibly hard. I still have yet to actually give an account to anyone about this. You're the first, in fact. Just DON'T do what I did and for the most part you'll be better off (not necessarily good but just better).
metconeprac
@mariawwe_ Right, honestly it will SUCK, okay. For quite a while at that. Did your counselor give you any advice or information about how to handle some of what is going on?
mariawwe_
this message may be offensive
It's so annoying that people in relationships are like "Because of you I am happy." Are you really going to depend on your bf/gf to give you happiness? Happiness starts with you. Don't rely on other people to make you happy. Make yourself happy. It seems like most of the time when people are happy is when they are in a relationship. But when they are not, they're depressed.
Bullshit, you don't need anyone to make you happy. Or else how will you really know true happiness?
Just a food for thought.
mariawwe_
My idol, Bayley is actually born in San Jose.