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@elegantflame  There she went again, driving that wedge between them. It made her wonder if she should have stayed away, rather than coming back. But at the same time, she couldn't. Damn it all to hell, but Jasper Hale had been her everything at one stage. Still was, if she was going to be honest with herself. But she was a terrible influence, had done some truly horrific things in her life. She was trying, trying to be decent, for him, but it was so damn hard. She didn't stop herself then, stepping forward, her arms wrapping around his waist, her face pressed against his chest. It felt like it always had, like home and comfort and while she didn't deserve it, she couldn't help herself. "I'm sorry," she told him, her voice muffled by the fact she had smooshed her face against his chest. "I don't want to lose you. I just... I'm just worried that sometimes, you'd look at me and you'd be reminded of the past."

@elegantflame ⠀⠀⠀⠀ “why can everybody else decide what’s good for me?”  he stands tall once more and takes a step back. they were never going to be more than a ‘what if,’ clearly. which shouldn’t surprise or hurt him, but it does. his heart aches in a way that he just doesn’t know how to handle. it wasn’t the first time, nor will it be the last time it goes through this. yet, it is the thought alone that makes his lips press into a thin line and his gaze flicker anywhere but her.
             ⠀⠀⠀⠀ “alice doesn’t care about me that way, and even if she did, i can’t care about her that way. so no, please don’t tell me that she’s good for me because i couldn’t possibly think of her in that kind of way—- the way that i think about you. the way that you consume every thought i have, how it kills me when you’re upset, or how much it makes me laugh that you possibly think i would ever be anything with alice. i suppose that she might be your definition of good for me, but she’s not /mine/, and that’s all i give a damn about.”  his teeth clench together as his hands become fists that he shoves into his pockets. perhaps it would have been a better idea to just leave her alone entirely. clearly this was only going to cause them pain, at least according to her.

@elegantflame Why? Because she didn't want to stain him with the past, with her past. She had told him, a long time ago in a moment of weakness under the cover of a starfilled sky, of the things she had done in the name of Maria. He had even seen some of it. He was trying so hard to be good, to fit in with the rest of them. It wasn't even just Alice, though that had hurt a little (a lot). It was that he had the potential to be good, something she was still struggling so heavily with. She reached out slowly than, her fingertips touching his cheek. "Because all I ever wanted for you was the best. Alice... as much as it pains me to say this, she would be good for you. She is stable, someone who isn't constantly living on eggshells, just waiting for the moment when she loses all self control. You and I... I love you so much, I always have, from the moment we met on that trail, but Jasper, we can't help each other when we can barely control our own selves. I don't want to keep dragging you down. I want you to thrive."

@doctorfang  He knew it wasn't something Jasper had given much thought to. He hadn't been part of their little family for very long but in truth, Carlisle hoped it was enough to help heal whatever trauma the other had been through. Even if he didn't consider them to be quite a family the way Rosalie and Edward did. "It is the least I can do for all of you. You all had your lives turned upside down. Sometimes normality is important."

@doctorfang ⠀⠀⠀⠀ the silence that stretches after carlisle speaks is long, filled with an almost uncomfortable energy. it wasn’t that jasper didn’t think of carlisle as a father, it was simply that it was.. difficult to do so. he was fatherly, and jasper hadn’t always been the best of people like he had.  “me too.”  it is all the taller boy can say before he clears his throat and looks down at his hands.  “for the record.. you’re a good father, even if you’re not ours biologically.”

* but that was just the problem. the words that would come out of her mouth would no doubt cause a scandal. she didn't want to rock the boat and upset everything. everyone was happy, but there was that itch, just beneath the surface, that she couldn't quite scratch * I don't even know where to start.... you found this life, after we got away. I know it took you a long time, but you finally found a place away from that part of our history. Sometimes, I think my being here, it just reminds you of that. Before you found me again, before you brought me here, were you happy?

@elegantflame ⠀⠀⠀⠀ emotions are not something that you can control.   [coming from the man that can literally control emotions. make that sentence make sense, jasper.]   you feel them, you can hide them with facial expressions, but you cannot control them. but yes, i think i could understand.   [he pauses then, shifting towards her.]   there is not a world in this universe where i would let you go again, lacey—- no matter what words come out of your mouth.

* of course he didn't miss her change in moods. Even if he hadn't been an empath, he wouldn't have missed it. She reallybhad to try better at hiding it, but somedays, somedays it was just hard * I don't think explaining it is going to help. You can feel it but would you understand it? Maybe you would and then we'd lose this friendship, two centuries of history gone. And for what? Because I can't control my emotions after all this time?