m . p a r k e r  (n.)

a loud, sarcastic, accident prone individual with a PhD in procrastinating and a doctorate in sleep deprivation. while not wishing for the ability to cartwheel, dying of the feels, or stressing, enjoys spending time talking, plotting world domination, and eating spaghetti. also known for being a cynical, easily distracted ball of hyperactivity.

warning: may anger you with bad puns and/or spontaneous singing and dancing

i have this problem where i would much rather read the stories i'm writing than actually write them