Family Don't Break

CHAPTER 36

TW: PTSD, panic attack

JACK'S POV:

I hear pleading come from the bathroom. Alex's voice. I run over, busting through the door. Alex is pressed against the wall, shaking. Katharine is wringing her hands, trying to figure out what to do. "I- I was unbuttoning her shirt, and she started to freak out, I don't know what to do!" I put a hand on Katharine's shoulder, a silent gesture that she's not at fault. I slowly walk up to Alex, and she shrinks away. I put my hands up to show that I mean no harm.

"Please. Don't." her voice is quiet, shivering just as much as her body. "Alex, it's just me. It's Jack. I'm not going to hurt you." I keep my voice soft, taking one step closer. "You're safe. I promise. I'm right here." the shaking starts to recede. "I- I could feel their hands, and I heard their voices, I was back there-" I gently place a hand on her shoulder. "I'm going to hug you, alright? Tell me if you want me to stop." I pull her in and wrap my arms around her. Her head rests against my chest.

"I'm sorry, I couldn't stop it, the memories wouldn't go away."

"It's not your fault. You're safe now, they can't get you. Take a breath." I hold her in silence for a few minutes until she stops shaking. I lightly kiss her head, rubbing her back. She pulls away, catching her breath. Katharine is still standing in the corner, watching with concern. "I'm okay. Sorry about all that." Katharine offers a soft smile. "Don't worry about it. I'm just glad you're okay."

"You still want to take a shower?" Katharine asks. Alex nods, her determination returning. "I'll be right outside, alright? Call me if you need me." I leave the room, closing the door behind me. I sit right outside the door, not moving an inch further.

When I saw that spark of determination in Alex's eyes, I knew that she was still there. She wasn't giving up yet. It gives me hope that she's going to be okay.

ALEX'S POV:

"You ready?" I nod my head yes. Katharine unbuttons the last few buttons. Then she helps me get out of the rest of my clothes, pausing to make sure I'm ready each time. She helps me into the shower and turns on the hot water.

I can feel the workhouse washing off me with every passing second. The water turns brown and slowly clears. Katharine rubs the shampoo into my hair. I tilt my head back to rinse out all the soap. I feel clean for the first time in a while. The water can't erase the memories, but it can erase the grit and dirt, make me feel more like myself.

Once I'm clean, the water is switched off. Katharine hands me a towel and allows me to dry myself off. I climb out of the tub, leaving wet footprints behind me. As I dry off, I look at my injury. The cut is healing, the blood dried. It's going to leave a scar, one that I don't want. But I can't do anything about it. I'll just have to learn to love it. Katharine bandages me up, covering the cut. I can still feel it, but at least I can't see it.

I pull on the clothes my parents gave me. They smell like home, and I revel in the scent. I never thought I would ever miss home this much. Katharine helps me to brush my hair out. The bristles get stuck in the many knots, but little by little we get them all out. When I look into the mirror this time, I see myself. Yes, I'm a little thinner and tired, but it's still me staring back. That's a bigger reassurance than anything else.

"Thank you, Katharine."

"Don't worry about it. It's the least I could do." she places a hand on my shoulder, her reflection smiling at me. "Let's go see those boys, Kath."