Not so simple life

Prologue

Louis

We were young and dumb, but we were in love. We were so damn in love.

I was 16 and he was a senior. We had been dating a few months before we decided to take our relationship to the next level and stupidly because we were both virgins we didn't think about using a condom.

It wasn't until almost two months later when I was getting sick, before we realized what was happening to me.

My parents never mentioned to me that I was a carrier until my mom basically dragged me off to the doctors office because she assumed that I had a form of eating disorder because I either skipped breakfast or puked after meals.

That's when I found out I was 7 and a half weeks pregnant.

I was scared out of my mind. I thought I was going to end up raising this baby alone and be in the streets after my parents kicked me out because I was a 16 year old pregnant kid.

But that didn't happen.

Yes, my parents were disappointed in me because I was a teenager and pregnant, but they were supportive. My mom talked to me all about pregnancy and my dad made sure that I knew he loved me and wasn't one of those dads that disowns their son for being pregnant.

When I told Harry, I thought that he was going to abandon me because he was supposed to go off to college and become a doctor.

We had a plan and that plan didn't include a baby. We were going to see each other on holidays and long weekends.

I thought that he would pull the "that baby isn't mine" card because that's what I've seen happen in the halls of the school whenever someone told their boyfriend they were pregnant. but his reaction was the opposite. He was so excited. He had recently lost his parents and grandparents due to a car accident a few months ago.

He had no other family so this baby meant so much to him. He was there for me every step of the way. He would talk about all the things we'd get to do as a family and he even found a college that was closer to us.

We spoke of our future and how we will show our baby that you have be a parent and get an education.

This new college he enrolled in would allow him to do a mix of online courses during the weekday so that I could finish high school and he would take in person courses from 8am - 1pm weekends.

Even though I was 16, Harry and I wanted to be married before I gave birth. So my parents signed paperwork allowing me to be married and at 6 months pregnant Harry and I went to city hall and got married. It was a small ceremony but it was perfect.

My pregnancy was perfect. Since all the money and properties went to Harry after the death of his family, he sold his parents house and we moved into to his grandparents place. I fell in love with the layout and I could imagine raising our baby there and eventually filling it up with more babies.

We had her nursery completed. Our car had a car seat installed. My parents even had a car seat in their car and set up a mini nursery for when we would visit or for when they would be watching our daughter.

We had everything planned for her. We were so excited and so damn happy.

All my appointments showed that she was a healthy baby. My water broke on my due date. Labor progressed normally. I was in pain  but it was worth it.

When it came time to push I was so scared. But Hazza was right by my side. My parents and our friends were in the waiting room supporting us.

After pushing I felt so relieved. I was going to finally hold my daughter. Life was perfect. Until it wasn't....

All the birthing videos I watched showed the doctors placing the baby on your chest after they were born.

When she wasn't placed on my chest like she was supposed to I knew something was wrong.

I looked at Harry for some form of guidance because I was so scared.

Harry tried his best to calm me down but I just knew something had happened to our daughter.

When Harry asked what happened to our baby, the doctor just looked at him.

I'll never forget that look.

No one could have predicted that her cord was wrapped around her neck. That the act of pushing was causing the cord to constrict and therefore it cut off her oxygen supply.

I pushed for 20 minutes. That was 20 minutes that our daughters brain went without oxygen. and when she was finally born, she was still. 

We buried her 3 days later.

I was so depressed. I thought Harry would blame me. I thought that he would hate me just as much as I hated myself.

But he didn't. He was there for me. I was there for him.

Our life just seemed void of joy. We would laugh and we would smile but it was all fake. We did that so that people would stop asking us if we were okay.

How can anyone be okay after the death of their baby? We never even got to see her open her eyes. All the joy that we were waiting for never happened,

Time passed and I eventually graduated high school. Harry got his undergrad in 2.5 years since he opted to do accelerated online courses.

After speaking with my parents I realized that I wanted to be a social worker. I wanted to work with kids and be able to help them.

I couldn't save my daughter but I could save other children.

By the time I got my degree in social work, Harry had already graduated medical school at 25 and got a job at the local hospitals emergency department.

I was able to work for a social services government agency that was based 20 minutes away from home so it wasn't too long of a commute. Part of the job requirement was to become a registered foster parent and since Harry had to get a background check before he got the job at the hospital it was easy for both of us to get approved.

We still had days where we were sad even though it had been years since we lost our daughter. We always found time to visit her grave but neither of us were ready to try again.

We focused on each other and our jobs. We were still madly in love with each other and it was always funny to see our old high school classmates envy us for being together for so long, of course everyone knew about what happened with our daughter so no one really said anything to our faces because who would be jealous of a couple that lost a baby?

Other than that life was great. Life was routine. Life was simple

Until it wasn't