CRAVE // A. K. AU ✓

6

"Awsten loves you. He's always loved you."

Those words played over and over in my head. I didn't know how to feel about them. I should've probably felt happy, considering the feeling was mutual. But in all actuality, I was scared. 

Two weeks had went by, and Awsten and I had not spoken. Geoff and Otto, however, I spoke with to seek comfort from my worrisome brain. Though, Geoff was not of much help. His flirtatious texts made me think about the situation I had put myself in, and it had even sent me into a fit of hyperventilation.

What did I do?

My parents seemed to notice my anxiety and every time they would confront me about it, I'd very unconvincingly tell them I was fine. They didn't believe that, but they shrugged it off anyway.

Today, though, felt different. After days of self-persuasion, I decided to grow a pair and end things with Geoff. Despite the talk with Otto, Geoff and I had continued seeing one another. I only did it to try and fight off the feelings and thoughts I had for Awsten, to no avail. So, I called Geoff.

The phone rang twice before he picked up. "Hey, Rayne!" he said, almost eagerly.

My tone was not so cheerful. "Hey, Geoff. How'd you sleep last night?"

Geoff might've noticed this, as he was silent a moment before he answered. "Oh, pretty good," he said, "I had a super weird dream though..."

Stalling, I asked, "What about?"

Geoff then proceeding to go into detail. "Well," he began, "I stayed up rewatching Game of Thrones for a little longer than I intended, and I fell asleep in the middle of it. In the dream, I was fighting alongside Jon Snow in the Battle of the Bastards, and let me tell you, it was cool as hell!

I sighed, unintentionally. "Sounds like it."

"Yeah, it really was. I woke up right before the good part though." He laughed once, "But I don't think you really want to hear this. I'm getting the feeling you didn't call to chit-chat. What's up, Ray?"

Shit, guess I have to get to the point now.

"I'm sorry," I whispered into the speaker.

"For what?"

"I don't think we should be seeing each other anymore. Not romantically, at least."

There was silence on the line, as if the brunette was soaking in my words. Finally, "I guess that's okay."

I almost choked on my spit. Why does he not seem upset? I felt like I should make sure, so I asked,  "Are you okay?"

Geoff chuckled nonchalantly. "Yeah, of course! I mean, I'm a little saddened that it's over but I felt like this was bound to happen. I don't think we were ever meant to be together. We've had our fun though. It was a nice, short, summer fling. And just like summer, flings come to an end at some point. Ours just happened to be two weeks. It was a nice time, though."

His words shocked me. He was taking this way better than I thought he would.

"Yeah," I agreed, "It really was."

"Well, I guess that's that," he sighed finally. "Guess I'll talk to ya later. Later, Ray."

"Later, Gee."

The line went dead. I set the phone down on my nightstand, and laid back on my bed, a hint of a smile on my face. Suddenly, a thought came to mind.

I need to see Awsten.

I shot out of my bed and got dressed. My outfit wasn't anything special, but of course the colors of each particle of clothing I wore were dark. I wore the usual, black band tee with dark, acid washed jeans and Nike slides. To be honest, I just grabbed the closest things around. I left the house without even bothering to tame my curls.

The walk to Awsten's house was a calm one, but too quick for my liking. It's not that I didn't want to see him, but rather that I was nervous to do so. Finally, I stepped up to his door. What if he doesn't want to see me? What if he yells at me and tells me to go away? With reluctance, I knocked thrice.

A few moments passed, and no one answered. My shoulders slumped and I turned to walk away. But, as I was halfway down the steps of the porch, the door swung open.

"Rayne?"

I turned to face him. Awsten looked a mess. His neon hair had now faded into a pastel green, unkempt. His unique eyes had a red tinge to them, as if he had cried recently, and a  light stubble shadowed his jaw.

"Hey," I breathed.

"What do you want?" he grumbled.

I took a few steps back onto the porch. "To talk to you. I messed up."

"Well, I don't wanna talk," he said and he began to close the door. I put my hand on the door to prevent him from doing so.

"Awsten, please," I pleaded, "Hear me out."

Awsten paused, and looked me up and down warily. "Fine," he said, opening the door and taking a step back so I could enter his home.

My shoulders loosened with relief, and I stepped inside. He closed the door behind me, taking all the light away and leaving us in darkness. "Uh, Aws?"

"Sorry." He flicked a switch, and a welcoming light filled the room.

With the light came the sight of Awsten's apparent depression. The living room was a total wreck, with dishes and trash and clothes strewn about. I could only imagine what the rest of the place looked like. I gazed from the mess to him, and he looked to his feet in shame.

"I apologize for the mess," he said, his voice but a whisper.

"It's okay," I replied, "Really, it is. I didn't know that what I did would hurt you this bad. But now I do." I paused a moment, then said, "Otto told me."

Awsten's eyes flicked to mine and a red tint washed over him, though I could not tell if he was angry, embarrassed, or both. "Did he now?" he asked flatly.

"And I feel the same way."

Awsten's voice caught in his throat. "What?" he wheezed.

"Awsten, I love you," I said, " And it's not in a friendly way, not anymore. It's...more than that. It's taken me way too long to realize that, and for that, I am deeply sorry." It was silent after that. My body was vibrating in fear, awaiting his response.

Awsten did not reply. He just stood there trying to say something, his mouth opening and closing trying to say something, but to no avail. He took a step closer, his eyes darting from my eyes to my lips, and he began to lean in. He stopped for a brief second, a fraction of an inch away from my lips, deciding whether or not he should go through with what he was about to do. He looked to my eyes for an answer, and I gently nodded in response. He closed the space between us, his nice, soft lips on mine.

I stood there, dumbfounded, just letting it happen. That is until I gave in, reciprocating the favor. His hands found their way to my hips and rested there. My hands buried themselves in his hair, pulling him towards me, as if he could get any closer. His face had the slightest bit of stubble, and it almost tickled as it grazed against my skin. He tasted of lemons.

The kiss lasted for what seemed like an eternity, until finally we pulled away, breathless and at a loss for words.

"Finally," Awsten said with glee, the corners of his lips tugged upwards into a big smile. The sight of it made me feel warm inside. "You have no idea how long I've been wanting to do that."

I laughed once, "I can imagine."

1330 words.

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