Cancer//adopted by my chemical romance

Chapter 10:

After laying in the floor for quite some time, thankfully with no one entering, I decided to get up and immediately push myself into one of the stalls, snapping the floor lock shut as I do so.

I don't want to go back to class, I can't.

I know that if my father finds out I will get a beating, but at this moment in time, quiet frankly, I know that my body physically could not handle leaving the small stall.

I slide down onto the dirty bathroom floor and find myself starting to cry as I begin to overthink everything.

Why couldn't life just work out for once?

What had I ever did to those girls to be treated that way?

I let myself silently cry for what must have been a long time, as I heard the bell go signalling the next lesson.

I didn't care.

I just sat there lost in my own thoughts.

I physically couldn't stop my weak heart from letting go, and my pitiful silent cries turned into hefty sobs.

Immediately I felt myself reaching for my phone.

I should call someone, they said it would be okay if I did.

Burden

Do not let them know

Don't cause issues for your family

I slid my phone back into my pocket.

//

I checked the time, 3.25.

I ended up spending the whole day on the bathroom floor, settling for listening to music for the rest of the day.

I know that tomorrow I'm going to have to face it all again, and I can't hide away all day then.

I'm going to have to get used to it, just like I did at my old school.

I can't have a mental breakdown about begging attacked, I just have to let them do it and then walk straight back to class, just like I've done before, just like I should've done today.

I pull myself from the ground and brush myself off, it was slightly dusty.

I make sure that my sleeves are covering at my arms, during my little 'episode' I had started to scratch at my wrists, making the self inflicted wounds from last night open up.

There was a bit of blood standing my wrists, but nothing that you could see with my sleeves pulled over them.

As I went to exit I pulled my plain black backpack over my back, and unlocked the stall.

I quickly checked myself in the mirror, luckily my messily styled hair looked fine; as that was the look I was going for.

It was a good job that I didn't have any mascara, as it would have definitely ran, my eyeliner, however, as it was just a simple, clean wing on both eyes, hasn't ran, which I was thankful for.