Enough

E19: Maria

Dear Maria,

To all Maria I know.

Since, you're the last person who asked me.

"What's the matter. Please let me know." - Maria

"We have a slot for you. You need to have courage to come."  - Maria

"I know, you can do it. No matter what it takes, it all started with goal that dreams into reality." - Maria

"Why it sounds so lonely?" - Maria

Since, I was sorry for myself.

I ended with true intention of doing well without them.

Isn't easy?

To dwell on what do I need to bring back memories with envious or vengeance.

To the first Maria,

I know it's crucial for you but for me. Definitely, dealing with Ms. Ong again. Won't easy.

Do I really need to explain myself or do I need regain my life again? Now that I have Syrene.

My cleverness is gone.
I know you sensed but I really meant it. When they see good, they expect too much. I don't want to live a life like that.

I'm a human too. Or should I say I'm a woman too.

Lust for Jose
Love for Mr. Mikael Wayne
Care for Ms. Liza Ong and Nathan.

Do you think about me that I was whore or a slut?

I'm hurting inside and guessing why Ms. Ong cleverness is the best sneaky way to know about my Syrene.

I'm crying and saying that I could make it but I have the gut feeling about it.

Now, do you believe what you heard?
Or should I say that because I'm only person I know the truth behind.

Do I really need to talk about it?
I'm crying.
Exhausted.
I hope you understand to understand my situation and concern here.

This is the only gift I know.
Crying until my throat dries out.
To Mikael Wayne, he says be strong enough without me.

I hate myself more than anyone else.
That do I really meant it?

So, the thing is the one who gossip you is the one who never be trusted.

Isn't?
Syrene come to my life.
She is the most beautiful gift I got.
My five-year old daughter Syrene.
She is fine without Mr. Mikael Wayne.
For now, I know Mikael Wayne is not that easy to deal with. He is Mr. Mikael Wayne anyway.
Wishing that he will come again in my place.

My only hope is he managed everything about my wish.
So, this time my Syrene was a three-year old.
Things are understandable.
I hope you too.

Second Maria in my life.

Don't forget about me.
I know you have a lot of resentment toward my decision about Syrene.
Thank you for make me feel home inside.

Third Maria of Syrene.

My voice is always lonely.
Thank you for making my day off.
Off from the noise.
You make my day pleasant.
You are always welcome to come over to my place.
Or should I say, I was the one who come over to your place. To make a suitable position for the better life of Syrene.
That's it. You manage to make sure that everything will be fine with or without them.
I'm happy to work with you.
In alignment with graciousness.

Now.
I need to let go the things that aren't feeling for Syrene.
I need to get out the best way possible to rid Jose not Mr. Lee.
To protect my Syrene.

To my greatest love Mikael Wayne.
I was a whore after you left me.
That's okay with me for now.
But things are better than yesterday.
Things under the table.
That you manage to make it.

But one thing is for sure. You are Mikael Wayne I know from the very beginning of the project in the Netherlands.

From "whore" Whitney