forever and always || c.h.

60

  Calum ended up falling asleep on me. We were just watching tv and when he started to get tired so I told him to take a quick nap. He asked me to wake him up at about three for whatever reason, and it was about 2:45 so he still had about 15 minutes left until I had to wake him up.

  I always hated waking him up because he looked so peaceful and cute when he was sleeping. Plus I loved the sound of his snoring and the way he's breathing was so level and calm. I don't know why I loved his snoring, everyone thought I was weird for it, but something about it was just comforting to me.

"Hey babe it's time to get up." I whispered and rubbed his back with one hand and played with his hair with my other.

"Hmm?" He mumbled and moved his head slightly to the side and further into the crook of my neck.

"Calum it's 3 o'clock." I said with a chuckle making him stir a little bit and stretch while he was still on top of me.

"Hey there sexy, how was your nap?" I asked with a slight laugh and ruffled his hair a bit as he woke up.

"That was the best I've slept in the past four days I think." He said and laid his head on my shoulder and closed his eyes, for some reason that helped him wake up more. I don't know how but it always did. I couldn't help but feel bad that he probably hasn't been sleeping because of me not being here.

"Don't feel bad babe, it's my fault not yours." He said and put his hand on my hip underneath my t-shirt.

"It kind of is my fault." I mumbled and kept playing with his hair.

"No it's not. Like you said when you left, I brought it upon myself. It's my fault not yours." He said and kissed my jaw which made me let out a sigh.

"I'm sorry if I broke your heart by leaving. I didn't want to hurt you." I said softly and guiltily.

"Madelyn baby this wasn't your fault. You didn't hurt me, I hurt myself and you. This was all my fault and I should feel guilty not you, so don't feel guilty please." He said and hovered over me and looked me in the eyes.

"I don't want you to feel guilty anymore. It happened and I forgave you and we're okay now. I just don't even want to think about it anymore. I want you to feel happy not guilty." I said and played with the hair at the nape of his neck.

"I'm trying not to feel guilty, but I look at you and I know that I hurt you and I hate that I did that. I'm just so angry at myself for it and I wish it never happened because I hate that I hurt you." He said softly and held a guilty look on his face.

"Can we just put it behind us and not think about it anymore? I don't want you to be upset all the time because you're thinking about it even after a I have forgiven you and established that we're okay." I said and he let out a sigh and nodded his head. I knew it would be hard for him to forget about it but I at least needed him to try.

"Go get ready. I have to go and get some stuff ready but I'll come back at like 4:45." He said and poked my sides making me squirm under him.

"Where are we going?" I asked as he got off of me and carried me to our room.

"It's a secret. But I want you to take a nice long shower and get ready for me. I'll pick out your clothes so you know what to wear and how to do your hair and all that girly shit." He said and put me on our bed.

"Where are you going?" I asked and turned to look at him as he got his sunglasses and his phone.

"I'm just going to get everything ready, I'll be back in a couple of hours. Which leaves you to get ready and listen to whatever music you want and as loud as you want. Even though you do that anyway." He said and I just smiled at him a little and got off the bed.