I won't die for you (but maybe I'll stand beside you)

A Mistake

Theo comes back to find Liam sitting on his front porch.
It's nearly dark and he looks almost ghostly in the blue light.
"Liam. What are you doing out here?"
Liam's head snaps up.
"You came back?"
Theo frowns.
"Yeah. Of course."
Liam's face is so confused that Theo feels a piece of his heart shatter and trickle into his stomach.
"Oh."
Theo can't take the look on Liam's face any longer.
"Let's just forget today even happened, yeah?" He says. "We can start our fake relationship tomorrow."
Liam looks like he wants to say something, but he eventually just sighs and nods.
"Let's go to bed." Liam mumbles, standing up.
Theo is presented with the biggest challenge of the night when he walks into Liam's room and realizes there's only one bed.
Liam seems to realize it at the same time as him but he powers through, just pausing for a moment before turning to Theo.
"Do you want the shower first?"
Theo nods numbly, freaking out internally.
They stand there awkwardly for a moment before Liam shakes himself, startling Theo out of his daze. Theo gathers his stuff and heads out of the room as quickly as he can.
When he gets to the bathroom he sinks back against the door and lets his pajamas fall to the floor.
After his realizations today, the worst thing that could happen is them sharing a bed.
He didn't ask for this kind of stress.
Theo sighs and starts getting ready for bed.
------
Liam flops down on his bed and presses his hands to his eyes.
With the way Theo is feeling toward him he suspects that this entire night is going to be awkward. He doesn't think he'll sleep much.
There's the sound of the shower turning on and Liam screams through his teeth.
------
Getting into the bed is an awkward situation as Liam's bed is pressed right up to the wall in the corner, so one of them had to get in first and the other had to shuffle in after, both of them trying to avoid touching the other.
Liam rolls in first, knowing that he won't get any sleep in Beacon Hills without a wall at his back. Theo stares at him strangely for a moment and Liam brushes his hair out of his eyes self consciously.
"What?"
Theo shakes his head and doesn't reply, slipping under the covers instead.
There's a moment of silence.
"Well I don't know about you, but I'm going to sleep." Theo mumbles and turns away onto his side.
Liam closes his eyes and tries to relax.
------
Theo must sleep because he wakes up with Liam pressed against his entire back.
They're in the middle of the bed and Liam has one leg twisted around his calves. Theo is warmer and more comfortable than he's been in years.
"Liam?" Theo whispers.
The other boy doesn't even stir, and Theo doesn't hear any changes in his heartbeat.
He decides to stay like this for a while, there's too much calm energy for him to want to disturb it. Theo lets his eyes drift shut, lulled by Liam's breathing and heartbeat against his back.
The next time he wakes up he's cold and Liam is gone.
He stumbles his way out of the bedroom. Theo can hear Liam's voice speaking happily to a deeper voice. His father must be home.
Theo pads down the stairs and just stands at the bottom watching the Dunbar-Geyer family.
"Theo!" Jenna says a moment later when she notices him.
Theo can't even smile at her because Liam is turning to him and the smile on his face is so bright Theo's heart stutters. Liam must be able to hear it. They stare at each other until Liam's dad steps forward and offers him a hand.
"I've heard you're dating my son."
Theo's smile sticks on his face and he shakes David's hand mechanically.
"I know we've met before, so I'll spare you the 'if you hurt him' talk."
Theo's hands tingle and he grins tightly, searching for Liam.
The other boy has turned back to the stove and is dishing some eggs.
Theo makes some bland comment and escapes to stand beside Liam. Jenna laughs.
"We'll leave you two to it, we're going shopping."
"Aren't you going to eat mom?" Liam asks, and shifts slyly closer to Theo.
"I ate a few hours ago love."
Liam hums in understanding. He jumps when Theo grabs his wrist.
Theo's heart is pounding and he's not sure why. It's not because of Liam anymore, he suspects it's more existential.
He's never had a family like this, and to be a part of it is wonderful, but it's fake. He's starting to realize that he's basically shut himself off from everyone but Liam and Derek.
Speaking of Derek, he'd know what to do.
"Where are you going, Theo?" Liam calls.
Theo halts with one foot on the stairs, he hadn't even realized he was moving supernaturally fast and is just glad that Liam's parents had left while he was zoned out.
"Theo?"
Liam sounds concerned and Theo internally sags.
"Yeah."
"Where are you going? Do you really not want to be around me that much?" Liam's voice is light, but he sounds actually insecure under it.
"I just have to, make a call."
Liam's face goes through a whole range of emotions before he settles on a frown.
"Right now?"
Theo feels his resolve denting under Liam's disappointment.
He looks away.
"Theo we have to work together." Liam whispers, walking toward him.
"I can't talk to you about this."
"Why?"
Theo huffs and turns away.
"I just need to figure it out first."
Liam growls and grabs his wrist.
"You keep disappearing! It's not like you and I don't understand."
Theo whips around to face him and closes the remaining distance between them. Liam's head tips up and his eyes cross trying to meet Theo's gaze. His hand tightens on Theo's wrist and his heartbeat audibly picks up. Theo blinks, surprised at himself. When Theo doesn't say anything Liam tries to step back. Theo grabs his elbows and keeps them pressed together.
"How are we going to keep this up if you can't even stand close to me?" Theo mumbles, feeling Liam's breath across his lips.
"Shut up." Liam growls.
"Why don't you make me." Theo challenges.
Liam grabs his biceps and shoves their mouths together. There's nothing gentle about this kiss, there's just desperation on Theo's lips and anger in Liam's hands.
"You're. So. Stupid." Liam bites out against Theo's lips.
Theo tastes the words and laughs.
"I'm stupid?" He says bitterly.
Liam's hisses and presses closer.
They don't speak after that.
Theo presses back and bites sharply on Liam's bottom lip, causing Liam to clench his hands and his heartbeat to jump.
Liam grumbles low in his throat and shoves Theo back against the wall by the bottom step. There's a moment when Theo gasps in a breath that Liam wonders what the hell he's doing. Then Theo is back with ferocity, cupping Liam's face with strangely gentle determination. It's nearly as good as fighting, the rush Theo feels when Liam shoves a leg between his and presses his shoulders into the wall with his palms.
"We should- get upstairs,"
Liam doesn't stop kissing him but he does stop shoving Theo back so hard.
Theo breaks away.
"We are not kissing as we go up the stairs, believe me, I've tried it and it's not fun."
Liam's eyes glow yellow for a moment and he pushes Theo roughly toward the stairs.
Theo nearly laughs, because that's clearly jealousy.
When they eventually make it to Liam's room Theo's heart is pounding and he's sure his eyes are glowing.
Liam shoves him into the bed and crawls on top of him. Theo can see his own exhilaration mirrored in the way Liam gazes down at him. Theo reaches up and presses a hand to Liam's cheek. Liam's face melts into something soft and confused.
Theo snatches his hand back and pulls Liam down instead, trying to bring the anger back into their kissing. Liam lets himself fall down against Theo's body, but cups Theo's jaw with both hands, tilting his chin so that they line up. Theo groans when Liam shifts so that their hips are pressed together.
Something has changed in the time it took them to get up the stairs. Theo is a bit overwhelmed by the way Liam is gently holding him. He huffs and flips them over so that Liam is sprawled beneath him.
Liam gasps up at him and his hands clench in Theo's shirt. There's a moment of stillness before Theo leans down to suck his way up Liam's neck. Liam's groans and his legs fall open.
Theo presses his forehead against the sheets and grits his teeth trying to restrain himself. They shouldn't be doing this. It's a stupid idea. Then Liam presses his hips up and Theo is gone.
Liam's heart thuds at the look in Theo's eyes and Theo grins as he hears it. He listens in delight as it speeds up when he starts to bite down Liam's neck and onto his collarbones. When Theo sits back Liam lets out a mixture of a moan and a groan of disappointment. Then Theo is practically ripping his shirt off as he rolls his hips and Liam changes his mind very quickly. Theo chuckles when Liam tugs at his shirt.
"Off." Liam commands.
Theo obliges and pulls it off. They just stare at each other, Theo's hips absently rolling, before Liam snaps and yanks Theo down by his hair.
The kiss is back to intense, but this time just with eagerness. Neither of them know exactly what's happening but Theo thinks that it doesn't matter right now.
They aren't kissing for very long when Liam pushes him back, breathing hard.
"I want you to blow me."
Theo blinks, hearing words like that come out of Liam's mouth is an experience.
"Yeah okay." He breathes.
The bed breaks as he shuffles down so that he can tug Liam's pants off. The other boy doesn't help at all, just stares at him with insolence in his eyes.
Theo doesn't get to it right away, instead pulls his own pants off then bites around Liam's hips to make him gasp. Liam would be begging if he wasn't so stubborn.
Finally Theo smirks up at Liam, causing to him to groan and let his head fall back onto the pillow, and goes down. And down. Liam clenches his hands in his bed sheets and Theo can hear the fabric strain. Theo would smile at the tension in Liam's thighs, but his mouth is occupied. He doesn't really mind the taste, but the best part is watching how hard Liam is straining to stay in control.
Theo bobs up and down, his hands holding Liam in place as he does his best to ruin the other boy.
It doesn't take long before Liam is groaning and tapping Theo's head. Theo ignores him and sucks until Liam gives in and comes. Theo wrinkles his nose but swallows and then crawls up Liam's body to demand reciprocation. Liam smiles softly up at him and Theo suddenly can't meet his eyes.
"What do you want?" Liam asks.
Theo can't answer, but he does anyway.
"Just a hand."
His voice is hoarse, and Liam's eyes darken farther even as his irises glow gold.
He wastes no time and Theo is forced to lean on his elbows because his arms give out a bit.
It's quick but Theo can't stop looking at Liam. He's a vision, sweaty, with hair sticking every which way and brow slightly furrowed in concentration. Eventually it gets to be too much and he bows his head to bite down on Liam's collarbone to muffle Liam's name as he comes between them.
Theo collapses as soon as Liam lets him go and Liam laughs as Theo thuds down on top of him.
Theo buries his face in the crook of Liam's shoulder to hide his stupid smile.
"Theo?" Liam mumbles after a moment.
Theo hums back, enjoying breathing in the smell of Liam.
"..."
"What?" Theo prompts, tensing slightly.
"Never mind."
———

Liam doesn't remember falling asleep, but he must have, because when he wakes up Theo is gone.
He sits up and swings his legs over the side of the bed. He can't hear anything downstairs so he just leans his head in his hands and lets out a strained breath through his teeth.
The memories are bright and right there behind his eyelids.
Theo, touching his face like he was worth something.
Theo, eyes unnaturally bright, teeth bared, slinking down his body.
Theo, hair getting in Liam's mouth and hands pressed into the pillow on either side of his head.
Theo, gasping against his collarbones after shouting a garbled version of his name.
Theo, naked, with all his skin pressed against Liam.
Liam clenches a fist and slams it down on his leg.
"Fuck." He groans.
Theo has probably left for good now.
Liam squeezes his eyes shut and whistles through his teeth. How is he going to explain this to his parents!
The worst part is that he doesn't regret it at all, even though this could definitely be the end of whatever friendship they had. Liam realizes that they were friends. Theo spent a lot more time than necessary following him around, and honestly, Liam had stopped minding a long time ago.
This whole thing was a bad idea.
Liam sighs and hauls himself to his feet. He stumbles around gathering his clothes.
He catches sight of white fluttering in the corner of his eye and stops in confusion.
It's a note.
'Sorry for running out on you. I've got to go talk to someone for a bit, but I'll be back babe. -T'
Liam groans at the 'babe' but feels a strange feeling in the base of his throat that he doesn't really want to examine.
On another note, who could Theo be talking to?
It doesn't matter, because at that moment Liam hears his parents open the door, chatting happily.
He feels a lump in his stomach as he goes to greet them. 
His mother laughs when she sees him emerging from upstairs in rumpled clothes.
She shakes her hair out of her beanie and grins up at him with an arm linked through his dad's.
"Where's Theo?" She says, raising an eyebrow.
"Um. He had to go do something." Liam replies in a strained voice.
Her smile falls.
"Are you guys fighting again? You seemed fine this morning." She asks in a concerned voice.
"I don't know. Being here has set him off somehow." He mumbles.
"Oh sweetheart."
Liam looks down and blinks fiercely.
He hates this uncertainty most of all, he's had enough of it in his life.
"I think I've made a mistake." He whispers.
His mom wraps her arms around him, and he's surprised again by the fact that she's smaller than him.
"You haven't done anything wrong, Liam."
His dad sets a hand on his shoulder.
"I saw how he looked at you son, he won't be leaving you any time soon."
Liam tries to smile but he's sure they see right through him.
"Oh honey." His mom murmurs.
Eventually she lets him go and they walk toward the kitchen.
"Liam." His dad questions. "Did you not eat your breakfast?"
Liam remembers abruptly what they were doing instead of eating breakfast and laughs nervously.
"I guess not."
He's met with incredulous stares and raised eyebrows.
———

Theo shows up several hours later with tired eyes and slumped shoulders.
Liam immediately corners him.
"Can we please talk about-" he lowers his voice. "About what happened earlier?"
Theo sighs.
"Can we not?"
"At least tell me where you've been."
"I went to find Derek." Theo mumbles, peering evasively over his shoulder.
"Why?"
"I just- had to talk about something."
"You know that you're really frustrating, right?" Liam hisses, grabbing Theo's arm when he makes to escape.
"I-"
"Boys!" His mom calls. "Supper is ready! I hope you're hungry Theo!"
Theo turns back to Liam.
"If it's going to be a problem we can talk later. Can't keep your mother waiting!" He says with a bitter grin.
Liam stares after him for one painful second before shaking himself and following.

*****
So. This is all written I've just gotta put it on here. I stopped posting it on here bc people weren't reading it but for two people?? I can do it