[dreamnotfound] soulmates

3;

Dream

the bus dips and bumps along the less smooth parts of the road, lurching my stomach when we pass over a quick slope.

i'm one of the only people on this strictly local bus. i just dropped off Drista at her friend's house, leaving her to walk two streets from the bus stop to the said friend's house. so now, i'm on my way to Techno's house, IFHY by Tyler the Creator blasting through my ears, and a haggardly old man staring me down with a cigarette hanging loosely from his wet lips. 

i chuckle nervously, giving him a small salute/wave and look deliberately back down at my phone. i silently pray for the bus to stop sooner than it's going to at this merciless pace.

eventually, after a meticulous route to the bus stop closest to Technoblade's place, and i swiftly get off as quickly as my legs will carry me. i try to ignore the unfamiliar shape of the pen in the back pocket of my jeans that Sapnap told to carry with me everywhere, now that my soulmate will hopefully be writing to me. instead of thinking about it, i hike my shoulder bag higher over the thick material of my sweater and start walking to Techno's house.

i always start to feel a little ill when it comes to my soulmate. only my close family knows this, but i'm gay. homosexual. man-love-man.

i'm just hoping that the gods above know this and have destined me with a male soulmate, because i'm really sick and tired of being single and seeing my older friends' faces light up with glee as they realize who their soulmate is or they see them down the hall or some crap. and i'm just stuck here, going to some lame party scrapped together by my immature friends when i could be writing my soulmate messages, asking questions, getting information.

whatever. hopefully this homie-hangout (not my choice of wording, Tubbo's) will lift my mood, and maybe i can squeeze in a message to my soulmate when i go to the washroom or something.

i climb the steps up to Techno's house. it's quite impressive, large and looming with huge, polished windows and floodlights illuminating the driveway. sharp corners empty space. a rich house. one of the ones where you would get full chocolate bars when you come trick-or-treating, you know?

just as i knock on the door, i hear a soft engine rumbling closer, and turn to see George's familiar Subaru gliding smoothly onto the empty driveway. he clicks off the engine and climbs out, slamming the door behind him and giving me a wave. i can see his white teeth show as he grins.

"ready for your birthday party?" he says as he catches up to me on the front doormat, just as i catch Techno's pink head of hair sliding into view. i roll my eyes playfully, letting my lips tug into a small smile.

"as ready as i'll ever be for crappy games and to be left on Read by my own soulmate." i respond, chuckling.

Techno practically crashes into the huge door, swiftly swinging it open and beckoning us inside.

he pants and shuts the door after we're both in. "welcome. please, strip your coats and follow me to the hell cave."

i shake off my long overcoat, grabbing my phone from the pocket and putting it in my hoodie pocket before Techno takes it and literally chucks it into the walk-in closet. George eyes him warily and instead grabs a coat hanger himself.

"oh? it's been renamed?" i ask, following Techno's hunched over shoulders down the hall and to the basement stairs. i can already hear Tommy screaming maniacally.

"no, it's just my own personal twist on a night sure to be packed with fun." he exaggerates, his words dripping with sarcasm. 

finally, we hit the basement. Tommy and Fundy are fighting for a spot on the couch, even though a perfectly good love seat is less than a yard away from them. Tubbo's digging around in the bucket of candy shoved against the wall, a pile of pixie sticks and lollipops growing around his feet. Wilbur's reclined on the ground, the most peaceful of them all, along with Phil in an armchair.

all this, and it's been half a minute.

i join Wilbur sitting on the red-magenta carpet, leaning back on my hands. George whisks past us and plops down on the love seat.

Phil gives me an approving nod. i can tell he's resisting yelling at the two boys fighting on the couch. "are you gonna write to her?"

her.

i feel my heart pang like i just got slapped. i try not to waver, nodding. "yeah, probably. s-she.. may not even be 18 yet, so don't get your hopes up, i guess." i fiddle my fingers in my lap, squeezing my pinky and wincing inwardly at my stammer.

George doesn't even look up from his phone, moving his head around and clearly using some Snapchat filter. "who says it's a girl?"

silence ensues in the bustling room. Tubbo drops a pack of Fun Dip. Fundy and Tommy just stare at George, their eyes the size of dinner plates. George notices the sudden pause and looks up.

"what? i'm not suggesting Dream is gay, but.."

and slowly, everyone's stares that were planted on George slide over to me. i chew on the inside of my cheek, willing myself to not burst, and raise my hands in defense, a signature move.

"oh, come on now. i'm not gay." i reason, hoping for dear life that the conversation can move along already. Tommy raises his eyebrows, his judgy stare looking me up and down as if i have a big sign somewhere that says 'I'M GAY!'.

"soulmates doesn't have to mean love. why does everyone here seem to forget that?" Techno butts in. the environment softens slightly, giving me some room to relax.

George snickers behind his phone and i shoot him a deadly glare. 

"what are you laughing at, Mr. Gaydar?" i snap. he looks up at me, his brown eyes crinkled slightly as he laughs more.

"you're so gay." he spits between giggles. Tommy practically barks, he laughs so hard, and i can tell that Phil is hiding a chuckle. i feel my face flush red.

"am not. maybe you're gay."

"oh wow, great retort. being gay isn't bad, Dream. in fact, i would take it as a compliment. gays are known to have the best fashion and best soulmates."

i puff out my cheeks. "good on you."

Tubbo stands from his position bent over the candy bin, oblivious to the scene. 

"what? something about Dream and George being gay soulmates?" he says through a mouthful of Jolly Ranchers. 

my face tingles with deep blush, and this time everyone in the room is laughing, including George with an awkward giggle. i swear i catch him glancing at me at least twice.

"no! shut up, Tubbo!" i yell. at this point, Tommy and Fundy have figured out how to share the couch.

"maybe you're not gay for me, but you're still pretty bloody gay." George says, tilting his chin up like he's soooo smart.

this pushes me over the edge. i stand up swiftly, clenching my fists, and stride over to George, who's still greatly amused.

"oh yeah? i'll show you gay-"

saved by the bell. literally. the doorbell rings for the first time since i got here. Techno gets up and hops the stairs. George follows him with his eyes before locking gazes with me again. a knowing smile creeps along his lips.

he leans a little closer to me. if he got any closer, our noses would brush. i feel warmth crawl across my cheeks.

"that was pretty gay. wanna kiss, gay boy?" he whispers.

my eyes dim and i crinkle my nose at him, nearly sprinting back to my spot on the carpet and sitting down, still fuming. George and Tommy let out sad 'awww's.

"no, come on! kiss me!" George whines, stretching out his arms.

"no! shut up!" 

Tommy leans over Fundy and whispers very loudly to George. "he just needs to realize his very strong love for you."

i groan. this is going to be a long night.

especially if my soulmate responds.