the wife and the swine

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@lulakaurrr

161,826 likes@lulakaurrrdas leben is wunderschoen

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161,826 likes
@lulakaurrr
das leben is wunderschoen

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- - -
lula's pov
it's 7:30pm in la and i just finished packing my last bag. i threw myself onto my now clean bed. 10 minutes ago, it was filled with clothes that i was taking to london. speaking of london, i'm going there for a break from everything. i'm a model and i'm so grateful for what i have and who i have become but sometimes it can become really hectic. i decided to go to london for a break and for some me time. i'm going alone although my bestfriend louis is gonna be there too. yes, louis partridge. when i started modeling he followed me on instagram and i followed him back and we instantly became good friends. best friends actually. he is gonna be there for a new movie shooting. i don't know much as it's confidential and i respect his privacy. he's gonna be pretty busy shooting so i doubt i'll be able to spend a lot of time with him. i decided to text on the groupchat since i've been so busy for the last couple of days and i feel really bad.

- - -
my wife and the swine
the wife🥰- olivia, the swine🦆- louis, princess👑- lula

princess 👑
hey bitches
what have i missed

the swine 🦆
oh my god
you are alive
oi
liv
you dead?

princess 👑
how comes when i come on
this groupchat olivia disappeared?

the swine 🦆
ffs
anyways you missed so much
basically
let me give you a short story then
the full story when we see each
other tomorrow!

princess 👑
okay but it's not gonna be for
long tho...

the swine 🦆
i know :(
anyways
olivia was talking to this person who
she thought was a boy turns out it was
13 year old girl

princess 👑
oh my god
how the hell is that possible?

the swine 🦆
well we are talking about liv
here

the wife 🥰
um excuse me
your story is 10x worse so
kindly stfu
and hey wifeyyy

princess 👑
heyyy and what was louis story?

the wife 🥰
well that ass was talking to
who he thought was a 16
year old girl but turns out it
was a 57 year old man who
was looking for love

princess 👑
i-
wait i can't breathe
lou
i can't believe you thought that
you were talking to a 16 year old

the swine 🦆
stopppp
okay i'm sad now

the wife 🥰
so who's story is worse?

princess 👑
lou's
100%
wait 110%

the swine 🦆
okay
i'm gonna go cri now

the wife 🥰
and he argued with me about his
name

princess 👑
wait what he's saved as?

the wife 🥰
YES

princess 👑
maybe if he didn't call draco ugly
he wouldn't be named as the
swine

the swine 🦆
i said i was sorry
i took you girls to get your nails
done
i bought you mcdonald's
i gave you both head massages
and bought you guys matching
soulmate rings since you were
crying you would never get a man
like draco

the wife 🥰
shush
i don't care

princess 👑
okay now that you list it out
i feel bad
okay i'm sorry

the swine 🦆
it's okay lu
still waiting for your apology
liv

the wife 🥰
kiss my ass you ain't getting
shit

princess 👑
oh my god
i'm dying
anyways bitches i will be at liv's
around 12:30 so lou make sure
you are there and i've got to eat
dinner and sleep so bye bitches. i
love you both

the swine 🦆
byeee

the wife 🥰
byee twat ly

the swine 🦆
why the horrible names

the wife 🥰
i made lula use them and
ill make you use them aswell
you just take longer to crack

the swine 🦆
you will never
ever
make me crack

the wife 🥰
bye bitch

the swine 🦆
bye very rude person

a/n
hey guys, i hope you enjoyed this chapter. i'm sorry for any mistakes. make sure you check out my other book, 'i promise'. it has louis partridge in it. please share and vote with friends and family, it really helps. leave any requests in the comments or private message me if you are not comfortable.

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