Fall Apart

Racing Thoughts - 1

(Autumn's POV)

It was 11pm on a rain November 3rd, I was stood outside my 28-year-old big brothers home knocking frantically whilst trying to keep both myself and my suitcase out of the rain.

"Autumn? What the Hell are you doing here this late? Come inside." North finally answered the door.

"Auntie Autumn!" My 4-year-old nephew, Anuson, hugged my legs.

Anuson was one of twins but his sister sadly passed hence Anuson's name meaning memory, remembrance or memorial.

"Hey Panda." I hug him back.

I always called Anuson panda because whenever I try to leave he clutches on to my leg like a baby panda.

"What's with the suitcase, sis?" North grabbed my attention.

Before I could answer him I started to cry, I don't know if it was my hormones acting up, or the realisation of my current situation hitting me again.

"It doesn't matter." North's 23-year-old wife, Charun, dismissed North's questioning.

Annyone who doesn't know any better would think Charun was my sister and North was my brother-in-law because of how close we were.

"Lets get you into a nice warm shower and changed into something dry." Charun suggested. "You can tell us everything later." Charun reassured me as she escorted me to the bathroom.

"North put the kettle on so we can have some hot coco, would you darling?" Charun bossed my brother over her shoulder as we disappeared down the hallway.

Of course little Anuson was now tugging on North's pyjama pants' leg excitedly wanting hot coco that instant like North could magic him a cup at any given moment.

"Leave your suitcase in the bathroom, I'll try to wring out most of the water and see if we can put them on the line to dry tomorrow." Charun instructs.

"Thank you, I hope I'm not bothering you I just didn't know where else to go." I start crying again.

"As long as I'm your sister-in-law you will never be a burden to me and even probably after too." Charun beamed.

"Don't tell your brother but I prefer to pamper myself with you than watch soccer with him." Charun joked to try and make me laugh, not gonna lie, it worked, I stopped crying again.

I entered the bathroom and locked the door behind me. I had already taken my shoes off and placed them besieds Charun, North and Anuson's shoes outside so I was careful not to slip in my wet socks on Charun's hard wood floor as I removed my cloths.

I kept my shirt till last because I was afraid of what I would see in the mirror. I was only 6 weeks pregnanat but because I was so small I started showing earlier than I hoped.

After I was fully undressed I carefully got in the shower making sure It wasn't too hot for the baby. Whilst I was in the shower I couldn't stop my thoughts from racing.

What will North think? Will North kick me out? Where will I go if he does? Will the baby be healthy? Can I take care of my child alone? Am I ready for this? Will I lose my baby like Charun? Finally going crazy from all my racing thoughts I let out a frustrated scream.

"Autumn? Is everything okay?!" North called from outside the bathroom.

"Yes, I'll be out in a bit!" I shout over the running water.

After I was done washing my hair I get out of the shower and wrap a towel around myself.

"Autumn? I brought you some of my spear clothes, could you open up?" Charun requests.

I open the door just enough to slide out my hand to reach for the clothes whilst using the door as a shield to hide my tiny bump that was very prominent in the tiny towel wrapped around the both of us.

My eyes widen as I stare at the silk night gown and robe, Charun and I are the same size before I got pregnant, this will cling to me now and they will know before I can even tell them.

After getting dressed I made my way into the living room where Charun was sat on the couch with a sleeping Anuson on her lap, there was a melted chocolate streak on his left cheek and cream on his upper lip showing that he enjoyed his hot chocolate not long before passing out on his mothers lap.

"Hey Autumn." Charun whispered. "Right I'm gonna put Anuson to bed so you can talk with North privately. Pour her a a cup of hot coco would you dear." Charun got up expertly with Anuson still asleep in her arms.

"Um... no hot chocolate for me please." I fold my arms over my stomach nervously trying to hide my bump as I sat down on the couch.

"Okay what's wrong with you? You love hot coco, you would never turn it down." North questioned.
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