Double Agent

Beneath the Surface

The beams of sunlight crept through the curtains, gradually passing further over my face, until I awoke, flashes of last night replayed in my head as my hands reached across the cool sheets of the bed, meeting nothing but the other side of the mattress. I blinked the sleep from my eyes, sitting up and searching the room for Dash, but I was alone. The deafening silence assured me that he wasn't in the shower en suite, and a blush began to creep up my neck.

Why wasn't he here? Was last night too much? Or did I-

I didn't manage to finish the thought before the door creaked open and I let out a sigh of relief as Dash came inside carrying a tray complete with orange juice, coffee and a plate of something which smelled delicious.

"Morning." He said with a smile, approaching the bed.

"Morning." I replied, silencing the parade of thoughts that had been threatening to overwhelm me seconds ago.

He hadn't left me. And that thought was enough to make my heart soar. I couldn't even put into words how much last night had meant to me, and for the first time since I'd arrived at the Calaway's, I had woken up knowing what I wanted from this experience.

"You're up early." I half yawned, stretching and feeling the satisfying pull throughout my limbs.

"Early bird." He laughed, sitting beside me and depositing the tray between us. "I had a few things to take care of, but I wanted to be here when you woke up." He rubbed the back of his neck looking a little guilty, a boyish grin tugging at his lips. "Guess I missed that."

"You made up for it with this." I replied happily, just as my stomach let out an audible rumble and I dove for the plate of food, lifting the steel dome from on top and melting at the sight of a neat stack of his chocolate chip pancakes, topped with a sizeable portion of sliced strawberries and a drizzle of chocolate sauce.

"Mmm, perfect." I sighed, picking up a fork and sliding it through the soft food, helping myself to a portion and practically dissolving into mush at the heavenly taste, much to Dash's continued amusement at my side. "I don't think that I will ever tire of these." I said as I finished that bite and returned for more.

As my fork slid through the layers like a knife through butter, I flicked my gaze to Dash, seeing a far away look in his eyes. I abandoned my fork on the plate, reaching out a hand and softly brushing his forearm.

"Hey, where'd you go?"

"Nowhere, I'm here, I promise."

I bit the inside of my lip, watching as his attention returned to the food on the plate. The more that I thought about it, the more that I realised the peculiarity of the dish being served. That was, until it clicked. With a heart-wrenching thud, I pieced it together.

"I asked you what your favourite was, but I've never actually seen you eat them." I mumbled. "Your brother said you never cook them... they were your son's favourite weren't they?"

Dash nodded, and I expected him to be sad at me mentioning his son. But instead, he brightened, as though the revelation had unlocked something so precious that he couldn't wait to share it with me.

"Ava was always a late sleeper, so I'd make us all breakfast. We loved pancakes, and Freddie was amazed by me flipping them. He'd sit in the kitchen and watch as I made entire stacks."

As he spoke I was picturing the scene in my head. A miniature Dash watching his father with adoring little eyes and a cheeky smile.

"He was my weakness in every way. I was a total sucker and could never say no to him." He laughed. "So when he asked for chocolate chips and chocolate sauce, I let him have it. I knew I'd be in trouble for giving him a dose of pure sugar overload, so I added a few strawberries to compensate, and from the first time he had them, he was hooked."

"He was a lucky kid to have you." I whispered softly, tears building in my eyes at the beautiful story, whilst my heart broke knowing the tragedy which snatched their little family's happiness and crushed the man beside me.

"I hadn't made them once since that day. I could never bring myself to try them, but when you asked, they were the first thing that I thought of." He said, shrugging as he added as an afterthought: "It's strange how the mind works I guess."

When I'd met him, I never expected there to be a time where Dash Calaway would allow himself to be so vulnerable with me. Yet there was no denying that he was bearing his soul at my side right now. I could see the remnants of the broken man who'd been gradually piecing himself back together since the devastating loss which had torn him apart. I could see the scars that would forever be etched into his heart and soul, and the ghosts which would forever linger at his side. But with all of those things now laying before me, I felt nothing but pure and undiluted adoration for him. I would have done anything to take away that suffering. To eliminate his pain. And as much as I wanted him for myself, I knew that if I could turn back time, I would do it in an instant, I would reunite him with his wife and child, and walk away, at peace with the knowledge that he was safe and happy. Sadly they weren't options, and all I could do to ease his agony, would be to walk with him through the darkness, nursing every wound as it was revealed to me, and ensure that he came out the other side, walking into the light, and not into cuffs.

Struck by an idea, I picked up the fork and lifted it towards him, squeezing his hand softly with my other.

"Maybe now you can try." I whispered encouragingly.

He let out a low breath and with only a brief hesitation, he took the bite of food, chewing slowly.

"I guess I had more of a sweet tooth than I realised." He said finally as he swallowed.

"Like father, like son." I beamed at him.

"Thank you." He said, sliding closer and drawing me into his side.

"Anytime." I replied, tugging the tray closer. "Now, help me finish this stack, or I may end up with a sugar rush of my own."

Dash's chest rumbled against me as he laughed, picking up the fork and dipping it back into the pancakes.