A little too much (A Shawn Mendes Fanfic)

Chapter 6

Teagans POV:

My breathing begins to slow as I calm myself.

"Lucy's death wasn't the only devastation of my junior year." I sigh trying to keep calm at all the memories flooding back.

"After Lucy died, I stopped coming to school. But when I was forced I would either hide in the bathroom or completely zone out in class, but that was pretty rare when I went to class."

"Nobody cared whether I went to school or not, the only person who did was Matt." I sniffle at the sound of Matts name.

"If I didn't come to school, he would be right by my side. Not worrying about the consequences of skipping school."

"He had told me a couple days after Lucy's death to always stay strong, his exact words 'I won't let you leave me you mean to much, promise me you won't leave me. Promise me' that was our first kiss." I smile at the ground with the memory of that day burned into my mind like it was yesterday

"I tend to find myself thinking back to his beautiful words when I'm feeling down, and his promise I still haven't broke, even when I'm on the verge of a breakdown."I close my eyes holding back my feelings.

I turn and face shawn looking to make sure I'm not scaring him. His eyes focus on the ground but his arms are still wrapped tightly around me, so I decide to carry on my story.

"Everyday I spent with Matt, we would both ditch and he would do what ever he could to make me happy." I sadly smile at all the memories me and Matt made over the years.

"About 2 months after Lucy's death was her funeral, but she was cremated so I never got to see her frail body after 'the incident' I don't think I could've anyway" I carry on trying to push through.

"The next day all I could think about was what I could've done, what I should've done." A tear rolls down my face. "It was my fault and I couldn't shake it from my mind."

"Later that day Matt texted me asking if I was okay:
___________________________
*M-Matt
*T-Teagan

M- T you okay?

T-Yeah I'm fine😊

M- T Ik your lying, I'll be over in 10 minutes to make everything better 😘
__________________________

"On the way here" I begin to lose the grip I had on my emotions.

I breath slowly.

"Matt got t-boned by a semitruck, drivers side" I lose the last hold I had and begin to sob into Shawns t-shirt.

He stays silent and let's me cry, not loosening his grip on me once.

"And the saddest part..." I whisper. "The police said that in the car" I sob, not being able to finish.

After a few minutes I regain my control and wipe my face of tears.

"In the car they found flowers, chocolate, and my favorite, a stuffed panda bear, which held a note."
___________________________
It read:

'T you are the strongest most beautiful girl I know, together we could make the strongest most beautiful couple in the world, I love you.'
~Love Matt<3~

'P.s. Never forget our promise'

___________________________
I pull the note out of my pocket. A tears drop onto the paper as I squeeze my eyes shut.

"You never got rid of the note" shawn asks in amusement.

I just nod my head

"I couldn't it's the--it's the only part of him-m I have left." I stutter.

I let out all my emotions and for the first time in forever.

I'm finally free..

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