Are you here?|Zauren

AYH?-7

I was pacing back and fourth anticipating Harry and Camila's arrival. "Can you stop? You're making me dizzy," Zayn laughed. I stopped and stood in place. "I'm sorry. I just-" I bit down on my thumb and then threw my arms up defeated. "I love them, I just don't want them staying here. I don't need babysitters."

"I know you don't, but if you act like nothings going on, maybe they'll leave earlier than expected." Zayn suggested.

"How can I act like nothing is going on? You passed away and yet here you somehow are in our bedroom sitting on the bed we used to share.." I let out a sigh and shook my head before I worked myself up.

"We still share a bed," Zayn said trying to see the bright side of the situation like he always did. "I know.. but you know what I mean," I said sitting on the edge of the bed beside him and leaning my head on his shoulder. Zayn carressed my arm and I shivered. Zayn pulled his hand off and placed it on his lap. I sat upright and turned to him. "I'm sorry," I frowned. "I really am used to it, but it still gets me sometimes.."

"No, I understand. I'm surprised you're even used to it.. I'm dead." I made a face at him, I hated when he made that joke. It still hurt. I don't think it was ever not gonna hurt.

I heard our buzzer and I rushed to the living room and held down the button. "Yup?"

"Lauren, it's us," Camila chirped. I looked over to Zayn who was standing in the hallway. "Come on up," I said, pressing a button allowing them entrance.

I rushed over to the door and pulled it open, staring down the hall until moments later our two friends exited the elevator and made their way down the hallway. "Hey Camz. Hi, Harry," I greeted them.

When they got to my apartment they both squeezed me in a group hug. "We're not even going to bring up earliers events because we know it's really soon," Camila said placing her duffel bag down on the floor beside the couch. Harry made his way over to the fridge, and it didn't offend me or anything because that's something he usually did. He'd get himself a beer or Zayn would hand him one.

Zayn was standing right at the counter watching Harry intently. Harry grabbed the beer and pried off the cap. "It's always this eerie feeling when I'm here," he said taking a sip. "Nothing against you or your place of course. I just feel like someone is watching me." Zayn smirked and crossed his arms over his chest. "Do you guys ever feel that way?"

"No, babe. It's just you. Who knows, maybe it's Zayn's spirit," Camila said spookily.

"Well, hey, Zayn, mate, if that is you.." Harry began, his head looking up at the cieling. "It's kind of invading my personal space." Zayn laughed and shook his head.

"That's Harry for ya," he said

Harry joined us at the couch. Zayn had his hands on my shoulders and I in a way felt at peace. If I didn't think that he was actually a spirit, then everything would oddly feel normal at this moment in time. Zayn kissed the top of my head and I felt my body untense.

"So, how long are you guys staying here?" I asked curiously. "I'm not trying to get rid of you or anything, I just want to know how long I, a grown woman, am going to be babysat." It came out a loud more rude than I had intended, but you can't take it back. "Your dad told us until we feel you don't need us here," Harry said.

"So, what are the precautions he told you two to take? What are the actions of mine he wants you guys to look out for?" I questioned starting to get frustrated. Lately, my reasoning part of being was very low. "Lauren, your dad obviously cares about you and we obviously care too," Camila said.

"I understand that, but you guys are caring far too much. I know you want to make sure that I'm not going crazy but it's too late for all of that. I lost my mind the day I watched the news and went to the hospital and was reconfirmed that yes, that was in fact Zayn in that car accident and no, he didn't make it. Camila, I know for a fact that you would lose your shit if God forbid something like that happened."

"Well yeah but-" Camila began.

"Let me guess, but you wouldn't go around claiming that you can see him, and talk to him, and even touch him. I get it," I nodded and took a sip from the wine I had sitting on the table in front of me. Zayn rubbed my arm and told me, "Don't do this right now." I let out a breath and tried to find my center.

"You don't understand even remotely close to what I'm going through. You can be supportive of me through this time but don't try to tell me what I feel and see and say it's a "coping mechanism."" I did air quotes with my fingers.

"Well back when I was taking psychology-" Harry started off. I rolled my eyes and crossed my arms. "Lauren, I know you don't like what I'm saying but I learned that it's a way cope."

I heard something break behind me and we all looked in that direction. A vase that Zayn and I got as a house warming gift from a woman down the hall was shattered on the floor. "I am so sorry! I just backed up, I don't know why I thought it wouldn't fall.." Zayn apologized profusely.

"No, it's okay," I said standing up and getting a broom and dust pan. "We never really liked that anyway."

"Are you... are you talking to him again?" Camila asked. I turned to look at her.

"What's it matter to you? I'm crazy either way.." I sighed and started sweeping it up.

"I want to believe you, Lauren. You're my best friend and I shouldn't have any doubts about what you say or do and I have heard about strange phenomenons like this occuring, but I guess I'm having a hard time processing the fact that it might actually be happening to you.." Camila said. "Someone I know."

Harry stood up and started glancing around in every which direction. "Zayn," he said loudly. "If you're actually here and you actually want us to believe you then you have to do something better than knocking over a vase. C'mon, mate."

"I'm not knocking anything else over.." Zayn said to me.

"Knock that plastic cup off the counter," he said. "If that happens then you're here." Zayn stood there with his arms crossed. Zayn and I already tried to go through all the loopholes. His current state of being.. or not being was strange. He couldn't pick things up and make them seem like they were floating, he could only literally bump into things and knock them over.

"Any day now Zayn," Harry said looking around. Camila and Harry were standing there with their eyes practically burning holes into the plastic cup. Zayn looked at me and I gave him a subtle nod. He bumped his elbow into the cup and it fell to the ground and bounced around before settling down. Camila squealed and pressed her hand against her mouth. Harry placed his hands on top of his head in disbelief. "Well, I'll be damned... welcome home buddy," he said breathlessly. "We miss you."