Forbidden Urge

Misunderstanding

Still when Philipp woke up on Monday morning, he was filled with a sense of achievement. He couldn't help being happy. However, by lunchtime, his spirits deteriorated again. Despite everything, even in spite of all her signals, Heidi was a colossal no for him. Even if she wanted something with him, which he now wasn't at all sure of, he couldn't touch her. He was not to touch her. His friends would never forgive him.

But what if they never find out?

Huh, chances for that were slim. He hardly believed he'd have enough of that Little Witch in a couple of days. Whenever he thought of her, he had so many ideas and fantasies what he'd do to her, with her, so that even years wouldn't be enough.

It was good that he didn't have her number. Otherwise he knew he'd succumb to the urge of calling her. And that could cause trouble. A lot of trouble. If he was wrong. His male senses and experience were telling him he was not, but what if he was. She would feel disturbed by him, she'd tell Arnold, and Philipp would lose that friendship forever, and God knows when and if he'd ever talk to her.

Maybe that wouldn't be so bad? Better to lose a good friend than to live in a misery like this, he thought once. And in the next second almost punched himself in the mirror. You're talking like a horny seventeen-year old, Philipp. Choosing sex over friendship. You're pathetic.

But it wasn't just sex. He suddenly realised. Yes, the need was primarily to get her rid of all clothes and enter her from every possible angle while she sighed his name, but he also wanted to sleep with her on his chest, to drive her to work, pick her up, cook for her, bring her to his games, introduce her to his friends - the boys already liked her - meet her friends, and all those routines happy couples do. Is there any future to it?

Wednesday afternoon they finished the training and immediately he arranged to meet Nicola Volkmar. She was among the most respected sports journalists in the country, great supporter of his team, highly professional interviewer and a good friend. She wanted to talk to him about certain events in the Bundesliga and his opinion on them, but only as friends, not for an official interview. That's why they picked a Hard-Rock Cafe in the city centre. The music was good and not too loud, and they had enough privacy to talk without being interrupted.

It wasn't too late when they arrived, barely seven pm. They ordered drinks and snacks and sat in a dark corner where the live band wasn't so loud. Since they talked about football and discussed his team's previous matches and also the matches of the German national team in the recent qualifications for European championship, he finally managed to forget about his love worries and get completely engrossed in the conversation with Nicola who understood him, his theories and predictions.

So engrossed that he didn't notice a group of four young adults entering the Cafe, a tall curvy blonde among them. She was wearing a black dress that she had worn to work. It was supposed to be just a quick drink, they pushed her out, to hear how the football game in Nuremberg had been.

He was explaining to Nicola what he thought might happen if all his players played all international friendlies over the next month, when he noticed the familiar colossal amount of luxurious blonde waves. At the same time, she stood up from the bar stool, stretching out her beautiful long legs, starting towards the bathroom, smiling at something her friends had said. Dear lord, she's fallen from heaven, Philipp instantly thought. She caught his eye, hers widened in surprise. She almost smiled, but something happened and her lips tightened. Her face became serious and white, eyes turned ice cold and she disappeared.

Philipp wasn't interested in the discussion with Nicola anymore. However, he knew it'd be rude to just finish it off now without a proper conclusion or explanation, so he decided to observe Heidi and her friends, and say hi whenever Nicola left.