Home Of His Heart

Chapter Four

Home Of His Heart
All Rights Reserved
© 2021 May Dahlia.

Word Count: 2560 Words

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Dear Jasmine,

I'm not sure if you will ever read this letter. You might not because you still hate me for what I did or because- I really don't what to write it down because if I do then it would make things too real for me to handle. I know that that is a cowardly excuse but I just can't. There are many reasons you might never read this letter and I won't say the ones that hurt to write because if you never read this then it won't matter anyway.

I know that you're mad at me because of what you saw when you were last at my apartment but I promise you, it wasn't what you thought. I'm not going to say any more than that because I know it will be pointless explaining it to you on a piece of paper. Besides, you and I both know you won't believe a word I write unless I say it to your face, when you can look into my eyes and tell if I'm lying to you or not, you'll only ever see it as meaningless words.

Knowing you, you're probably thinking, 'If that's true and nothing actually happened between you two then why couldn't you explain it to me then and there?'. I wonder the same thing and sincerely, I can't come up with a good enough reason why. Perhaps, I was so overwhelmed by the thought of losing you that I couldn't think straight and do the sensible thing. I didn't want you to leave because I knew I would never be able to go back to who I was and it wouldn't be the same if I didn't have you there with me anymore. That made me irrational so instead of giving you a reason to stay, I took the chicken's way out and tried to make you stay against your will.

Out of all the things that went wrong that day, I regret that particular mistake the most. I should have been straight forward, I should have just told you the truth, instead of letting you imagine the worst, I should have-, there are so many things I should have done that day but I didn't and now I have to pay the price for my greatest mistake. I let go of the first woman to love me in ways that my heart could not understand, the only one person whose love I know I could never find anywhere else in my lifetime. I lost you in so many different ways that I could never forgive myself for, and for that, I truly am sorry.

I'm sorry for hurting you despite all the promises I made to protect you and defend you, sorry for making you feel like the second best to someone else after promising to remain loyal to you, sorry for letting you go when I promised to always hold your hand no matter what. Sorry for everything I ever did that went against our love for each other after swearing my devotion to you. I'm sorry for all of it but I hope with all my heart that you one day find it in your heart to forgive me for everything I did wrong.

All my love for you,

Keith.

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When he got home that night, he couldn't sleep. He still couldn't believe what the doctor's report had said but at the same time, he couldn't imagine anyone believing it either. Somehow and in some way Jasmine wouldn't be indisposed for the rest of her life. She was okay but the reason she remained ina coma was so her brain could take its time to heal and although there were a few complications that had resulted in her not waking up, they were still clinical normal, and all in all, she was alright.

The doctor had explained that she would be in a coma for a while and although the closest ultimate was three to six months, the doctor had said that it was possible for her to remain in that condition for a year or more, it could easily be seen that each and every person standing in the room was hoping in their own way that it wouldn't go that far. Keith most especially hoped it was the former, not only because of how much he wanted to express how sorry he was at the time but because it was his fault and she should never have been the one paying the price for his mistake.