800 Days

Chapter 2 - My Sorrows

All I want to do is drown my sorrows. Anna knows what today is, and yet she is so happy.
Never mind my sadness or misery, she is showing me why I despise her so much.

When we are in bed, it is never in my room. That is reserved only for Laura, and when she died I moved into another bedroom. Anna has tried several times to get me to move back in to that room, but I will never disrespect Laura that way, dead or not.

So far Anna is taking over, and while a small part of me wants to kill her and be done with it, the other part of me knows what Laura will think. I changed for her, and to kill Anna will prove I have reverted back to those old ways.

Domenico has done his best to remain civil and respectful with Anna, and I can clearly see just how much he despises her also. Anna thinks my family and staff love her, but the truth of the matter is they all barely tolerate her.

Everyone loved Laura, and seeing how much loyalty I have received from everyone since her death do I know just how fortunate I am to have their unwavering support.

Mario is also looking at me with concern, and while I try to not show my emotions, today makes it all the harder. I dream of holding Laura in my arms again, and to make slow passionate love to her in our bed.

Ironically, I have always enjoyed rough sex, but with Laura, I wanted it to be so much more. The one and only time it was, I have never forgotten the feel of her fingers over my body and through my hair when we looked into each other eyes, and I regret taking so long to show that side of myself to her.

I have those feelings to cling to, but I make sure when Anna and I are together I play my part. However, I keep my eyes firmly closed, and I push myself to make it go quicker than it ever would have with Laura.

I am barely intimate with her, and in all truth if Anna does know I don't care. Something inside of me will never forgive myself for allowing Anna to do what she has done, and when I eventually am ready to take her on she will wish it is her who died and not Laura....
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I am so worried right now. Massimo is struggling to keep the family business together, and Anna is slowly taking charge. Two years ago I put a plan in motion, one that I never thought would cause so much hurt and pain.

At first, I thought Laura was nothing more than a passing fling, but seeing how he has reacted to her 'death' and his feelings regarding Anna, do I see now I misjudged the situation.

Laura surprised me too, and when she agreed to do this for Massimo, did I then realise just how much she loves him. When Laura told me about Giovanni I thought this would be the end of the family.

Now, seeing how much Massimo needs them both do I understand what needs to be done. Laura has done a fantastic job with The Italia, and when she suggested building a Hotel, I personally loaned her some of the family money.

Not only has Laura delivered on her loan, but she has ensured Massimo is the main stakeholder. I was proud and grateful she chose to do that, and when she suggested also learning to speak Italian, did I see what the family has.

Laura is without doubt the best thing to happen to not only Massimo, but the family as well. With all that is currently happening, I need to ensure that she and Giovanni are protected.

When I visited Laura a couple of months ago, I needed to discuss the latest developments with her, see how the hotel was going, and also see the son of my nephew.

Giovanni is truly a Torricelli, and if the day ever comes Massimo finds out about him and Laura, the family will be whole once again, and Anna will not know what is coming.....

Laura has kept her promise to me and the family, so now, it is my turn to keep my promise to Laura that I will look out for Massimo, even if he doesn't know it, yet.....
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Tonight is going to be a night to remember. The night is beautiful and the sky is clear and full of stars. As I put Giovanni to bed, I head into my office and am about to be on a conference call to Rome.

Due to my 'death,' only a handful of people know I am alive, and as a result, I have had to be extremely careful with who I do business dealings with. I am about to finalise a deal which will see The Italia have another Hotel and Casino built, and this one will be in Rome.

With Mario's connections, I was able to acquire a large pocket of land for a reasonable price, and with all the red tape close to finalised tonight's call will be confirmation of the start of construction.

With this, I will be required to travel to Rome. Luckily I have had a face mask done by a plastic surgeon who specialises in cosmetic masks. When I am in Italy, I will be wearing my mask. Now I can speak fluent Italian, I won't be so out of place. I can't risk Massimo or anyone in his family finding out I am alive, at least not yet.

Giovanni and I are flying out next month, and it will be wonderful to show Gio what his heritage is all about. Hopefully one day we will be able to return home, but for now, this is what is necessary to protect the family, and the man I love more than anything......