All The Little Things

o n e

Caspen

7:00AM - wake up
7:30AM - eat breakfast
7:50AM - drive to school
8:00AM - sit in hell for 8 hours
3:00PM - go home

That's my day, Monday through Friday. Over and over again. I wake up to my mother's vacant room and my father passed out on the couch from his previous evening. I throw on some clothes, fix my hair, grab an apple, and leave before he wakes up.

I like to sit in my car whenever I can because it's really the only place I can get away from him and have a little peace and quiet, which is very rare in my house.

I try to avoid my dad at all costs. I guess my mom had the same idea, that's why she left. Almost 7 years ago and I've been dealing with my dad ever since. His random outbursts. His drunken episodes. His addiction. His beatings. All of it, because she left. I don't blame her though, I would leave if I could. I would do it just like she did too.

"Hey momma, what are you doing?" I ask as my skipping came to a halt, seeing her throwing stuff in a random bag.
"Oh hey pumpkin!" Why does she seem nervous? "I'm just grabbing some things to visit your Aunt Kate."
I wonder why she's going now? And without me? We normally always go together, I won't question it though.
"Okayyyy," I say dragging out the last letter while leaning on the open drawers of the dresser "well when you come back, can we do a puzzle? The new one you just bought? It looks so cool!"
She looks at me with a slight frown and places her cold hands on my cheeks, staring me straight in the dark eyes I got from her, "Of course baby. I can't wait. I love you Cass, don't ever forget that, okay?"
I look right back at her with the most amount of love a little boy's eyes can hold, "Okay momma." After that, she picks up the suitcase and small green purse she'd always carry around, placed a soft kiss on my forehead, and walked right out the glass door.

Little did I know that she would never return for me. For her pumpkin. For her baby. For her Cass.