Summer Sun {Larry Stylinson Book 1}

Chapter 17

Louis' heart is literally beating out of his chest. He made Harry feel things he never felt before. He did that. "Hazza, I..." Harry hushes him. "No, Louis . Please let me talk first. Let me explain why I am basically shitting my pants feeling this way about you." Louis just nods, taking Harry's hand as support. Harry looks down at their hands and smiles. He could get used to that feeling.

"You are a boy." Harry starts. Louis can't hide a smile. "Well, yeah I am. I do have a dick." Harry shakes his head fondly. "Glad to hear your sass is back, Tomlinson." The two boys laugh a little but then they get serious again as Harry continues.

"I have never had feelings like this for a boy and it scares me. I never thought I was attracted to boys and there you were in that bathroom and you made me feel weird from the moment we met.

I didn't want you around because I felt weird. When we were in the club well... Seeing you... Did things to my body and..." "You got a boner." Louis interrupts. Harry rolls his eyes. "Let me talk." Louis giggles and nods.

"You took me out when I locked myself up in my room and it was so sweet and then I messed up by telling you I don't trust you. You started to ignore me and I went mental. That's when I realised I really wanted your attention, needed your attention. When we were on the beach that night and made up, I think I never have been so relieved." Harry bites his lip, trying to hide a smile. He loves that memory from them.

"Than that night from the game you were there with Katie and it killed me inside because you spent so much  time with her when you ignored me. But the next day on the boat you reassured me she was nothing. I believed you, I really did Lou but then I got this..." Harry stands up and takes the envelope out of his bag. He decided two days ago to take it with him so he could confront Louis about it. Louis takes the papers out and his eyes are gliding over the papers.

"Shit Haz, this..." Harry shakes his head. "I don't need an explanation now. I want to continue my story." Louis only nods, lost for words as he looks at the papers in front of him. No wonder Harry wanted to distance himself. Louis fucked up, big time.

"Singing  with you during karaoke night was amazing. Having you on my lap just felt trusted. Like it was supposed to be like this and I was looking forward to our hang-out session." Tears are forming in Harry's eyes and they are already formed in the blue pair.

"I was waiting for you for one and a half hour... When I finally heard a knock on my door I was so happy but then there was just that bloody envelope and..." Harry bursts out in tears and Louis just hugs the boy. "God, I'm so sorry Hazza. Never meant to hurt you. I would never hurt you on purpose. I should have told you about Katie, she honestly just wasn't important to me and we were doing so great. I didn't want to ruin it. I told you the truth ,you didn't have a reason to be jealous, Harry. I promise. She knows nothing about me, not like you do. You mean something to me, she doesn't.  I fucked her once when I was drunk. She kept throwing herself ar me and you were just all the time with bloody Kendall and..." "Were you jealous?" Harry interrupts the smaller boy. Louis thinks back about that one particular night. The night where he completely fucked up.

Louis has been drinking all night. The show just finished and he is sitting with Katie and Lisa, knowing they are thirsty for his attention. Louis choses a chair with a view on a particular curly boy he has been avoiding. Louis ignoring Harry doesn't mean he can just let him go. He wants to know every move of the younger boy. He needs to know. The boy has such an effect on him. Louis hopes by ignoring him this weird feeling just leaves. He is not ready for that particular feeling called love, not yet.

Katie and Lisa are talking and talking and Louis just doesn't pay attention. His eyes are not leaving the boy. His jaw clenches when Harry is laughing together with Kendall. Louis has been trying to put a smile on his face as well but failed every time. He even tried to pay him dinner, still Harry didn't smile once. Kendall just has to talk and she has the boy wrapped around her fucking finger. Louis wants push Kendall away and take her spot, making Harry laugh. He wants to have Harry's attention. When Kendall stands up and kisses Harry's cheek, Louis completely loses it.

"Tommo, are you okay?" Katie asks. Louis didn't even notice her friend left. "I'm fine, really." "You can always feel better, you know." Katies hand is resting on Louis thigh. "Yeah, I know. I'm good now, though." Louis says before taking another sip of his beer. "Come on, Tommo. You don't have to resist. I know you want to." Katies hand goes higher and higher. Louis looks at Harry who is now doing a crazy dance with Kendall. They are both laughing like crazy and Louis feels a pain in his chest. Harry doesn't even care they don't talk. Louis is nothing in Harry's eyes.

"On one condition." Louis says, placing his hand on Katies. "Anything." Louis tries not to roll his eyes. Desperate much, aren't we? "No strings attached. No feelings. I'm not in love with you or something, Katie. It may sound harsh but I'm not playing someone's emotions. This is just a one time thing and I don't want you to expect some special attention from me after. So if you have some sort of feelings towards me just tell me because then it's not going to happen." Louis is honest. He has younger sisters himself and he couldn't imagine someone play with their feelings. "I'm not in love, promised. Just a one time thing and no expectations." Louis nods, taking her hand. "Let's go to your room then."

"Like hell I was jealous, Haz. I wanted to push her off a cliff, honestly. I was trying so hard to make you smile before and you just shut me out while she did it so effortlessly. I wanted to be her. You made me feel weird as well. I haven't been in love for seven years and..." "You're in love with me?" Green meets blue and Louis nods. "Yes, Harry. Yes I am. And believe me when I say I understand that you are scared as fuck. I am as well. I've only been in love once and that ended horribly. I can't and I don't want to imagine us ending horribly. We are Harry and Louis, Louis and Harry. We have a crazy pool competition going on, do crazy things together, are stuck on each other's side. We flirt, have the same passions and we just..." "Fit." Harry finishes the sentence. "We do... We fit. And it scares me, because after four weeks you're gone and I don't know if I can deal with that." Louis is fighting his tears and Harry nods understanding. "But like you mentioned. We are Harry and Louis, Louis and Harry. We will figure it out, I promise. I just really need you Lou. And I need you to be completely honest with me." Louis nods. "I'm not ready to tell you everything about my life yet, Haz. I know I will be one day and that might even be tomorrow but right now I'm not. But I promise you, anything you ask me, I will answer you honestly. I can't stand lying to you. You know I used to fuck Stan occasionally but I never touched him after that time in the club. I didn't touch anyone after we were fine. You are the only one on my mind Harry, I promise." Harry kisses the smaller boy on his forehead. "I believe you. Let's take this slow, not rush anything. I don't want to mess this up." Harry whispers. Louis nods, agreeing with the curly boy. They are laying down, tangled in each other. Nothing more, nothing less. This is exactly what the two boys need before figuring everything out.