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♪ ┈┈┈┈┈┈┈ ♪
Wilbur's house was quiet, and Eret hadn't gone home yet. Despite it being his house, Wilbur was nowhere to be found, having retreated to his room to call Phil almost an hour ago. Romeo didn't want to bother him. He wanted time to figure things out, that was okay. Both Romeo and Eret could understand that, understand the crossroads that Wilbur may have been at. Romeo was at least glad that Wilbur had someone like Phil in his life to talk to.
He wished he had had someone like that when he was in his teen years and he started to question his own sexuality after starting to date Esmeralda. The only person he really had that he could talk to about it was the girl, and she seemed a little put off about the fact that her new boyfriend was starting to question whether he even liked girls. She had been supportive, however, and they remained friends to this day anyways.
Romeo wished he could have gone to his family about it, but they were less than inviting about the fact that their son liked men. His mother was particularly orthodox in her beliefs about sexuality and wondered aloud some days why she wasted all her money on medical bills for the boy if he was just going to turn out 'wrong'. He did his best to avoid it, but sometimes the words and thoughts lingered in the very back part of his mind, waiting for a weak moment to erupt back up.
They had ordered some food a while ago, and an empty hot chip box sat, discarded, on the coffee table, while a movie that Eret couldn't understand played on the television. He didn't really mind though, more focussed on the boy with his arms around him then on the foreign film. Romeo was muttering translations under his breath anyways, speaking the English words so that Eret could understand the story. Still, he wasn't really following what was happening on the screen all that much. Some sort of romance story with some action mixed in. There was a train, and some characters trying to do a heist of some kind.
He felt calm, for the first time in a long time. A stillness had come over him, and for once he actually wanted to sleep. Eret had been awake a lot over the past two weeks, unable to rest his mind enough to let him fall into a sleep that would actually help him. He had fitful naps, tossing and turning, annoying his roommate, staying up until ungodly hours. He missed lessons sometimes - though he would always get notes from people he knew in his lectures who were happy to help him out. He hadn't been taking care of himself, and that was his own fault. Letting himself get too caught up in everything.
Letting himself get too caught up in Romeo.
He needed to rest.
He let himself sleep now, however, and Romeo didn't realise for at least ten minutes, too engrossed in the movie to see that the man's breath had calmed and soft snores had started to come from him. Once he did notice, however, Romeo stopped his quiet translation, staying quiet so the brit could get the much-needed sleep. The two of them were laying across Wilburs couch, taking up all of it due to their height, Erets feet were hanging over the edge both from being 6"3 and from the fact that he was further down the couch, his head resting on Romeo's chest, head tilted to the side to face the television. Romeo had his arms around the man, and every breath Romeo took moved Eret's head on his chest.
His fingers ghosted along the side of Erets face, brushing along his jaw, then to his temple. Absentminded affirmations that the man was indeed there, with him. His hand then rested itself on the mans back, holding him.
Romeo didn't want to sound sappy, like a hopeless romantic teenager who scribbled hearts in their workbooks and dreamed about their future with the popular boy they had a puppy love crush on. He also didn't want to sound clingy, like he wasn't independent. Like he couldn't be himself without Eret. The problem was, that he didn't want to be himself without Eret.
He liked having Eret there, he liked the feeling of the man hugging him, trusting him enough to fall asleep with Romeo around.
Romeo looked up when a door opened, and Wilbur walked into the room. He looked less nervous now as he had been when he and Eret had returned to the house. The man nodded, glancing between Eret - who slept silently now - and Romeo, who looked just as tired.
"You guys have dinner?" He asked, like a parent who was taking care of their kid and his friends who were staying the night. Romeo smiled and nodded, gesturing with an open hand to the empty packet on the table. Wilbur nodded, looking like he was checking off a mental list in his head. "And- did you want any blankets or anything? I don't think Erets' going home tonight." Wilbur kept his voice quiet, not wanting to wake the sleeping man.
"Wh-w-we're good Will," Romeo assured, making the man nod in response.
"Well, there's some more food in the fridge if you get hungry, and there's blankets in the linin cupboard if you get cold,"
"Th-th-ank you."
"Alright, well, I'm going to bed," Wilbur paused, scratching the hairline on the left side of his face as he thought of anything else to say. "Goodnight." Wilbur turned the left the room, leaving Romeo alone with a show he'd seen to many times, and a man he wasn't sure how to feel about. Wilbur's door closed in the distance, and the house returned to silence once more, allowing Romeo's thoughts to run wild in his mind.
Sure. He liked Eret, a lot, a lot more than he originally realised. But their situation wasn't all that picturesque perfect. Eret still had a university in America to focus on, and Romeo made his home halfway across the world from the man. He wondered if they could ever make it work because he really wanted it to work. Romeo knew Eret would always be too far for him to hug when he got sad, or take out for dinners. He was always a phone call away, but that was it. The phone call couldn't lead to either of them coming to visit. Romeo didn't want Eret to waste his money, and he couldn't be spending money on plane tickets every other week. It would have been a nightmare to maintain.
Maybe he doesn't think about it now, not when he should be enjoying the moment with Eret. Romeo finds peace in that, in the feeling of Erets breath slowly rising his chest, the comfort of having him close.
This couldn't be all perfect and resolved though, could it.
When they had gotten home, Romeo asked Eret if he really wasn't angry at him for disappearing as he did. For hurting him. Eret looked reluctant to answer at first before he had sat Romeo down to explain.
"I am angry, but I don't want to be angry now that I know you're safe and I have you here. I'm going to feel angry, and sad about what you did, but I'm not going to take those feelings out on you. You did what your instincts told you to do to keep you safe, even if the danger was mental rather then physical," Eret had hummed softly as he thought of a better way to explain it. Unable to find one, Romeo assured him that he knew what he was talking about and knew what he meant. Erets anger was valid, and he was of course allowed to be angry, Romeo just didn't understand how Eret could be angry with him and yet still be content to lay on his chest and go to sleep.
How were they going to make this work?
Maybe that was a thought for tomorrow. For now, Romeo could enjoy having the man close to him.
Twenty minutes passed of no sleep on Romeo's part - the show on the television had long since turned off - and the house was quiet. Incredibly quite. So much so that the only thing that Romeo could hear were the passing breaths of Eret. Slow and soft. Romeo wondered what it would be like to fall asleep so easily.
Fall asleep. So easily.
Romeo's head drooped and his eyes closed, falling into a dreamless sleep, his grip unconsciously tightening around Eret, holding him closer.
Maybe it was a comfort to Eret to wake up in Romeo's arms. See him sound asleep. And maybe he was happy that that was the best sleep both of them had gotten in a while. And maybe he was conflicted because how would they make it work?
