It was a little after eight at night when I knocked on the door of Lucky's. After a minute, Andrew appeared and unlocked the door, letting me in. He was dressed in his usual denim jeans and black t-shirt, except this time his hair was wasn't styled. His black hair was normally gelled back, but the tousled look made him less intimidating.
"Hey you made it!" he exclaimed.
I held up my guitar case, "I did!"
"I wasn't sure, Jack said you had a long day."
"Uh yeah, I did but I wasn't gonna let that ruin my opportunity to perform for you" I explained and did my best to smile.
"Can I get you a drink?" he offered.
"One of those Smirnoff drinks would be nice!"
"Coming right up!"
I looked around the empty bar, plastic had been laid over tables and chairs, and there were tools and buckets of paint scattered around.
"It's weird when it's all empty in here" I mentioned.
"Yeah" Andrew laughed, "but it's kind of nice sometimes too" he handed me a bottle and held his up, "cheers!"
"Cheers!" I repeated and tapped my bottle against his.
"So, what song are you gonna sing?" he gestured to my guitar.
"Well you'll have to bear with me, I've had an emotional week so the song I chose is kind of sad" I admitted.
Andrew smiled, "I'm looking forward to hearing it." I took a big gulp of my drink before setting it down on the counter and picked up my guitar case. I set it down on one of the tables and pulled my acoustic guitar out.
Andrew unwrapped two of the chairs covered in plastic, one for him and one for me.
I sat down with my guitar in hand and took a breath before looking up at Andrew in front of me. I was surprised how at peace I felt in this moment. It must be the fact that I'm taking a step towards something I've always wanted to do.
"So I will be singing, 'Stay' by Rihanna. Sorry I feel like I've been listening to it on repeat" I laughed.
Andrew laughed with me, "I've been there" he encouraged. I can't imagine what it would have been like to be cheated on. I guess that's a good perspective for my situation.
I strummed a few times to make sure my guitar was in tune, "okay, here goes!"
I looked down as I began the song, a little afraid of what Andrew might think. Yeah, my friends and family said I was great, but isn't that what you're supposed to say? Will Andrew be honest with me? Do I want him to be honest?
Finally as I was ending the song, I looked up. I couldn't read Andrew's face, he kind of looked concerned maybe? His eyebrows were furrowed and he writhed his hands.
As I carried out the last note I looked back down, afraid of what Andrew will say.
"Casey" his voice was thick. I looked up and he smiled. His full smile that made his eyes crinkle and his dimples pop, and I was glad I was at least sitting. "That was— wow!"
I put my guitar back in the case, "is 'wow' a good thing or a bad thing?" I asked nervously as I snapped the case closed.
He stood up next to me, our bodies only inches apart. "Definitely a good wow" he explained quietly.
I looked down and then back up at him, my face beaming, "really?"
"Really" he breathed out and then cleared his throat, "I mean seriously I have to admit I wasn't expecting that."
I stood on my tippy toes and wrapped my arms around his neck to hug him. He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me closer, "thank you, that means so much to me" I breathed out.
"So, I was thinking of advertising this open mic thing for a few weeks, but if you want the first night it's yours!" Andrew added, still hugging me.
"Yes!! Wait..." I pulled back, "you're not just saying that right? Like to make me feel better cause I've had such a crappy week?"
Andrew laughed, "no, I'd never lie to you Casey" he assured.
I pulled him back in, this time laying my head on his chest, "thank you Andrew, for giving me a chance."
"Of course" he replied softly. After a few moments I let go and Andrew took a step back and shoved his hands in his pockets.
"Well okay!" he cleared his throat again, "I'll let you know the date as soon as we get back up and running."
"Sounds good! I'll let you get back to work then" I replied awkwardly. The excitement has my mind and my stomach in knots.
Andrew locked the door behind me and I made my way back home. I was about to walk into my apartment when I realized I was too excited to be home alone. I set my guitar inside and then walked over to Caleb and Jenny's place. They were both cuddled on the couch watching tv.
"Hey!" Caleb smiled, "how did the audition with Andrew go?"
"How did you know about that?" I asked, sitting next to them on the couch.
"He told us this morning" Jenny answered.
"Yeah, he was pretty excited" Caleb wagged his eyebrow. Jenny slapped his shoulder.
"It went well!" I ignored whatever it was Caleb was insinuating, "he said I can have the first night" I bragged.
"Ahh nice!" Caleb bolstered.
"Yeah I'm so excited I haven't been able to stop smiling since I left."
Jenny raised an eyebrow, "really?"
"Uh yeah! I haven't preformed for anyone in years, this is kind of a bid deal" I though it was obvious.
"Uh-huh" was all she replied.
"So, not to bring down your whole mood" Caleb began, "but what's going on with you and Scott?"
I groaned, "ugh why is everyone so pushy about this?"
"The question is, why aren't you pushy about this?" Caleb coaxed.
I let out a deep breath, "I don't want to do this anymore, but I can't imagine not being with him" I confessed.
"But you're not really with him, are you?" Jenny pointed out.
"That's my problem!" I exclaimed.
"Look Case, I love Scott like a brother, but you have to do what's best for you" Caleb suggested.
I grabbed my necklace and held the compass rose, replaying Caleb's advice in my head. I started to get frustrated, why did Scott do this? Why couldn't he at least talk to me about it first? I decided to find out. So I stepped outside and called.
"Hey" he answered, "how come you called instead of FaceTimed?"
"I uh, I just needed to know why you didn't ask me before reenlisting?" I blurted out.
"Oh" his voice fell.
Scott, I need the truth, please." I pleaded.
I heard Scott take a deep breath before answering, "I tried, Casey, so many times I wanted to, but..." he took another deep breath. "You were so excited about me being done, I just didn't know how to ask. Then, I had to make the decision."
"And what? You just figured I'd go along with it like the first time?" I accused.
"Well, yeah" he admitted.
I couldn't respond. While I was happy he was being honest, I was still too hurt and angry with him.
"Are you still there?" he asked quietly.
I breathed out, "yeah, I'm still here, but I have to go" my tone was short.
"Um, okay" he replied.
I hung up. My heart was racing and I felt like I could just scream. I marched into my apartment, looked around to make sure no one was around and grabbed a throw pillow off the couch. I sat down and buried my head into the pillow and just screamed. I felt ridiculous, but I didn't care as I continued to scream out all my frustrations into the pillow.
"You okay?" I heard Dani's voice.
I sat up, looked at the pillow and laughed at what Dani could possibly be thinking right now.
"No, no I'm not Dani" I was blunt.
She smiled, "can I join you?"
"Uh sure, why not!" I threw her a pillow and she joined me on the couch. "It's extremely cathartic" I encouraged.
Dani smiled before burying her face into the pillow and screamed.
"Wow!" she said and sat back up her caramel hair in disarray, "that really is cathartic" she laughed.
"Right?"
This time we both went, we screamed until we couldn't scream anymore. Then we ate ice cream. Lots of ice cream.
"I'm gonna miss this" Dani lamented as we sat on the kitchen floor eating out of our own cartons.
"Me too" I agreed. "It's not gonna be the same here without you."
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The Little Things: Trilogy
RomanceLife is full of curveballs and you can't really plan for everything can you?