Alone and Stone Cold

Chapter eight

My brain felt like it could explode right in that present moment. Never had I ever had to deal with so many equations in one day. Tomorrow was the day of the math quiz and Zoénna had come over so we could polish up on a few concepts.

" I think we got this!" She said once we finished the last equation.

"Are you guaranteeing me an A plus Ms Arden?" I imitated her voice while asking her the same question she had asked me the day we found out we would be partners.

"I bet it on my puppy Scruffy!"

I couldn't help but burst out in laughter. "Why would you call your dog scruffy?" And her embarrassed facial expression made me laugh even more. When it didn't look like I'd stop she started to pack her books indicating she was about to leave.
Finally I gained composure, not entirely but I could keep a straight face.
"I'm sorry, Scruffy is a...a very... unique name."
I looked her dead in the eye and all composure I had went out the window, this time she couldn't help but laugh as well, just a little though.

"You know what Bryson, if you're going to just sit there and take my dog and I for a joke then I have to leave ASAP." She continued to fuss with her bag. I could sense the glint of humor in her words.

"Oh come on Zo I would never take Scruffy for a joke." As soon as I said that she stopped so still that my laughter came to an abrupt end as well. At first I looked around, assuming maybe she had heard something weird around the house but when I heard nothing myself I looked back at her. "Did I say something wrong?"
I asked that for the sake of it, not believe I had actually said something amiss. Girls were just complicated like that. One minute it's all fun and games and the next they have turned ice cold. Thank God Aerin was still too young to be this moody, but it would only be a matter of time. Somebody needs to update that list of why I don't have a girlfriend.

As if she was finally pulled out of her trance by some force, Zoénna looked at me swiftly and continued with her bag, handling her books delicately this time. "No,umm it's just that it's been a long time since someone has called me that." She smiled a smile that carried some emotion in it. To answer the question I had only mentally asked she said, "Zo. My dad umm, he used to call me that." I couldn't help but notice she was speaking of him in past tense but I didn't want to assume the worst.
She sat back and sighed deeply.
"He passed away 4 years ago. Hearing you call me that just kind of brought him back a little." She closed her eyes and I let her have her moment of nostalgia.

"Look I'm sorry, I had no idea...look I'll never call you that ever again..I"
Her eyes flattered open and turned her whole body to face me.
"No no no.." she lightly chuckled between every 'no'. "It's fine Bryson. I'm the one who's sorry, didn't mean to get all sappy on you." I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding.
"In a way hearing that felt...good." She said to herself more than to me.

"Well....I'm glad." I struggled to find a good word. She just smiled in return. Right then a vibration echoed in the silence. It was her phone on the table. We both looked at the caller ID as the device was not so far from either of us. The word "mine" with a heart emoticon flashed across and I registered that it was Nathan calling. She quickly picked it up. Not before shooting a confusing look right at me. Was that guilt I saw?

"Hey baby!" She cheered through the speaker. I couldn't hear what Nathan was saying on the other end but he sounded like he was reciprocating the energy.
They spoke for like ten minutes. At some point through that I had relocated to the kitchen in an attempt to give her space. And I just couldn't help feeling like trash. I mean nothing hectic had happened between Zoénna and I, but Nathan was my boy. And I felt like I did him dirty even if I wasn't the one that initiated the whole thing. Blame it on the alcohol or whatever but everything just felt wrong.

"Hey.." Zoénna brought me back from my thoughts. I now turned my back against the fridge and faced her. "I think it's time I go back home since we're done here?"

"Yeah sure. Umm do you need a lift home or..."

"No, no. Nathan's picking me up so I'm good thanks." We just looked at each other at the sound Nathan's name. She knew we had to tell him and I was sure she could see that I was fighting the urge to do it myself.

"Look Zo..." Just then my front door burst open and we moved from the kitchen to see what was the cause or who was the cause. Speak of the devil.

"Lanez!" Nathan reached his hand out to dab me and I returned the gesture. We made small talk about tomorrow's quiz and his trip and then he and his girl were out the door. Zoénna didn't even look back to say goodbye. A little bit of me was bothered by that but the wiser side of me continue to emphasize why this whole situation felt like a ticking time bomb. Guilt does that to people, I know a guilty person when I see one. If Nathan was as smart as I know him to be, he'd realise he's dating one.

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