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Chapter 40

Y/n POV~

Flashback

"I'm worried.. About the future" I hear from one of the bedrooms. I cautiously make my way to where I hear the two voice talking and hide myself behind the half opened door.

I feel guilt and contemplate leaving until I hear my name mentioned.

'well if it's about me then it's fine if I listen right'

"I just can't stop thinking about what if y/n says she doesn't want to come with us even though time is running out, I mean we've been here almost 4 months but since we last talked about it nothing has been said.. I don't want to leave without her.. " jimin says almost in a whisper.

Tears threaten to sting my eyes in worry that everything was starting to put a toll on them because I can't find it in myself to say something.

I'm filling these boys with worry when they're here to feel relaxed.

I zone out for a moment listening to the two a little longer.

"but.. I think everyone is thinking the same. Even y/n. I don't know what will happen but I do know this isn't entirely our choice and we need to wait for y/n  so if it helps ease your mind I know she will make the right choice for her"

After hearing yoongis words I push off the wall and leave.

All I feel is pressure but maybe this kind of pressure is good because I might actually find it in me to actually say something and not keep hiding away.

Just as I go to turn down the hallway I pick up on jimin's words.

"...because I don't think I want to see the future where she isn't there with us.. I feel inpatient and it's eating me up inside just thinking about it"

My heart clenches in my chest and the tears I had held back were long since fell from my eyes.

'I'm sorry I'm taking so long but please give me a little more time... I still haven't said goodbye'

.......

Present time
 
 
 
"you was there earlier..i know"

My eyes meet his and my pupils shake at the sight.

His usually smiling face was nothing but a pit of sadness, even his eyes didn't reflect the light the way they always have.

"I-I'm sorry.." I whimper out. My knees threatening to cave in.

His arms encase me in a warm embrace and I make no action to escape.

"n-no you shouldn't be sorry.. I shouldn't be complaining about anything it's your decision that effects you most.. How could I even begin to think that putting more pressure on you would be okay.. I'm sorry y/n-ah I really.. Really just don't want to be without you" jimin cries out.

My body freezes as his tears fall onto the tops of my cheeks, every inch of my being trying not to fight myself for making someone so precious to me cry.

"I.. I don't want to be without you either..you have every right to complain. I'm stressing you all out by taking my time.. I- I'm just dragging this all out in hopes you can all only have good memories here when in reality our future is all we can think about" I hug his waist tighter, burying my face to his chest to hide my own flood of tears.
 
 
 
"you aren't dragging anything out y/n-ah" a voice adds.
  
 
I look up in shock to stare wide eyed at the rest of my boys.

"J-Jin?" I stutter

 
"you really think I wouldn't notice my princess sneaking off" he gasps, making my chuckle lightly.

"what about me?" jimin asks "I disappeared as well you know" he huffs out.
 
"yeah yeah I noticed" Jin replies only to get a sour look from jimin.
 
 
The mood lightens slightly and I feel a weight lifted from my shoulders.

"im sorry...to you all" I mutter into the silence. I hold a hand up to silence the bubbling protests and let out a breath.
 
 
"I'm sorry because I let this go on too long.. Because back when things first became serious I had thought about the future but pushed it to the back of my mind...i shouldnt have let this get to this point, where I'm only giving you all worry and not the happiness I want to give you" I step closer to the group by the door and take jimin's hand in my own.
 
"I'm scared to finalise my decision because it means it will really happen.. I will have to say goodbye and only have memories to hold me in place. I'm not a great person, Im not good with crowds or even speaking up when my order is wrong. My life is boring and my only friend acts as though he's joined some kind of gang.. But.. But you all accepted me for who I am. You who gave me a chance to experience a whole new life and even love"

 
My knees buckle from beneath me as I try to find the words I want to say to barely manage to suck in a deep breath between my sniffles.

 
 
"y/n-ah.." hobi calls out in worry, his feet coming into view but I can only hold another hand out to pause his movement and words.

 
 
"wait I'm not done.. I need to stop hiding away from doing this... I love you all so much that right now I can't imagine myself anywhere but with you all and if that means moving on from this tiny village then I...

 
 
.. I will come with you"

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

If you cry you loose

I lost 😭

For real if anyone needs a good sad hours playlist hit me up I have like 6 for different kinds of sad 🤺🥰

And can we just talk about the fact this story is on 86.9k readss??????!!!? #) & (&(£) __(#) =#) &) # HELP I FORGOT HOW TO FEEL YALL YOU BROKE ME 😭😭😭

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR STICKING WITH ME THROUGH THIS JOURNEY SO FAR AND FOR WHAT IS LEFT OF OUR TIME TOGETHER 😭🎉 I love you all so much