slowburn | billie eilish

chapter two

"babe, are you sure you're okay to miss the next few days of school? as much as i'd enjoy you coming, i don't want you to fall behind in your classes."

"yes, mom. i'm sure. i wanna come with you," i respond. my mother is going on a business trip to la to do something for work. she knows that i can stay home alone now, being 18, but still offered to bring me with her.

i could definitely use a break from school. after monday's events, this week has been so weird. it's strange that that one sentence from a boy in my english class could result in so much drama. most of my school is very accepting and socially advanced in regards to like lgbtq stuff, but they're quiet about it. the opinions of the sports players, the rich kids and socialites, shine through oftentimes instead. they're regarded as "superior," because of their social status in the school, i guess.

i'm now the most popularly known "lesbian" in my school. i'd much rather have spread that information in my own time, but nope, a labeled was slapped upon me. it's not like i don't want people knowing; it's more that there'd be less backlash had i told people myself, face-to-face. people tend to judge more when it's a faceless stranger.

several instances have occurred where people i don't know have come up to me and asked questions: it's weird. there has only been one malicious occasion: one of jonas's friends from the soccer team came up to me.

after confirming that i was indeed the face that fit the name sage, he angrily accused me of being the reason jonas was benched this week. he told me that the team had an important game coming up, and that he didn't need my "queer shit" messing that up for him.

i wondered if he really thought that was my intention. or that jonas's actions were purposely done by me? like... sis... that was his own fault. instead of cursing him out and speaking those thoughts though, i just told him that i was sorry his friend was benched, but that i didn't ask for jonas to say what he did and get himself in trouble. he rolled his eyes at me and pounded his fist against the locker beside my head before walking away.

so anyway, yeah, i could definitely use a break from the social pressure i'm under in the school environment right now.

my mom nods and tells me to go pack my stuff for the next three days. i'm not quite sure what she has to do, but i'm sure it'll be fun, or at least better than school right now.

*time skip*

billie's pov:

"billie, i love you, but you can't be serious right now," i hear finneas yell after me as i run to the front door.

i roll my eyes as i grab my keys, yelling out, "going for a drive! everything's fine mom," knowing she'd beat my ass if i hadn't said anything.

my wide steps cease as i walk up to dragon. "fine ass," i whistle lowly as i tap the driver's side front door twice in appreciation. i open the door and get in, starting the ignition.

"where we gonna go tonight?" i ask aloud to no one.

as the matte black sports car takes me to nowhere, i feel my frustrations dissipate. i roll down my windows and close my eyes in bliss, thankful for this moment right now. i try to forget about what just happened with my fool of a brother. i love him, but he really gets on my nerves sometimes, holy fuck.

i look down to the volume nob as i turn the volume up to a deafening level, letting mr. brightside blast out of the speakers throughout my car. i love driving. especially at night; it really is a great release for my emotions. it's a sense of freedom, you know? being able to go anywhere you want and no one to stop you.

the wind rustles through the black ends of my hair, and i feel my head cool. i let out a heavy sigh of relief that soon hitches in my throat.

an animal runs out into the highway. 

fuck. i'm going too fast to stop: i'm going to hit it. my eyes widen and in a last second decision, i yank my wheel to the left and swerve my car off the street, right into a ditch.

"holy shit. holy shit. holy shit," i pant out, my breathing uneven. that did not just fucking happen. where did that even come from?

i put my car in park and just take a breather, inhaling long breaths and feeling the air in my lungs leave in longer ones. i close my eyes and rest my head against the wheel, trying breathing exercises my therapist taught me a while ago.

my calm-down routine is brought to a cease when i hear a knock on my window and i jump. a chestnut haired girl smiles in concern at me with her eyebrows furrowed and makes a motion for me to open my window.

it takes a moment to register what she wants, but i do roll down my window to hear her ask, "hey, you okay? i just saw that all go down."

i shake my head, "shit, yeah, i um- yeah," i murmur unsteadily. i know that wasn't convincing, so i take a breath. "sorry, yes, i'm okay. thanks."

she nods, and asks if i need anything. i open my mouth to tell her no, but "could you just sit with me for a minute?" leaves my mouth instead, surprising myself.

she looks shocked, but the expression fades away quickly and she walks around my car to get in the passenger seat. "what's up?"

a/n: AYY chapter two. i feel like i've already caused too much drama for just the first two chapters JHSDJSHD. it'll calm down i promise. thoughts?

word count: 1000 (exactly, lol that made me happy)