Simply The Best (A Patrick x David parent au)

A little bit Sophie

Hey humans! So, just a quick note before we dive into the oneshot for today: I know that some of the words in the song will be misspelled, that is just because that is how Sophie is pronouncing them.

Sophie: Six years old

The two husbands pulled their car into Alexis' driveway, putting it into park and stepping out onto the gravel driveway. Patrick and David had been out for most of the day, meeting with a few clients down in Elmdale, so, they left their daughter with her aunt. 

"Alexis!" David called as he opened the unlocked front door.

"In here, David!"

As they made their way from the hallway and into the living room, the soft sound of footsteps came running towards them. Sophie called out for her fathers as Patrick lifted her into his arms.

"Papa!" She giggled, a dopey grin spreading across her face, showing off her pearly teeth.

"Hey, sweetheart. How was it spending the day with Auntie Alexis?"

"It was awesome! She taught me dance, can I show you? Please?" She dragged out the last word.

Patrick nodded and placed her back down on her feet. She ran over to Alexis, who waved slightly at the couple before shifting her attention to her niece.

Sophie whined for her to put on the music, so she did, and sat down on the royal blue couch next to her brother.

"Are you ready? Let's do it. I'm a Lambogini, I'm a Hollywood star, I'm a little bit tipsy when I drive my car,"

Both David and Patrick recognized the song just seconds after she started performing the tune. They looked to Alexis, who was mouthing the words to Sophie, and just broke out into laughter.

"I'm expensive shushi, I'm a cute huge yacht, I'm a little bit single even when I'm not. I'm a little bit... I'm a little bit... I'm a little bit... I'm a little bit a- La la la la la la la, a little bit Alexis,"

Patrick had taken out his phone and hit record so that one day, they could look back and laugh at this precious moment. The three of them were seeming to get a kick of out this, and David could hardly control his amusement, laughing until he heard his daughter say 'vroom vroom bitches.' At that moment, he turned to his sister and shot her a look.

"Hah-hah, vroom vroom, bitches. Hah-hah, vroom vroom, bitches. Hah-hah, hah-hah hah-hah, ew, David!

"She's a little bit... she's a little bit... She's a little bit... She's a little bit, Alexis! La la, a little bit Alexis! La la, a little bit Alexis! Vroom vroom, bitches,"

As the music slowly and softly faded out, Patrick gave her a round of applause. Sophie looked over to her aunt, who gave her two thumbs up as a sign of reassurance.

"Did you like it? It's aunties song, did you know that?"

"Oh, you did great, baby girl," David praised, glancing once again at Alexis and picking Sophie up, "but I think it's time to go home, this way we can have some dinner."

"Okay, daddy! Bye, auntie, I love you!"

"I love you too, Sophie," she booped her nose.

As David walked towards the door, he turned and faced Alexis once again. "And after that, I don't know if I'm ever leaving you alone with my child again, Alexis."

"Oh come on, David, Patrick liked it. Don't be a little b."

"I never said I didn't enjoy it, I just didn't appreciate hearing my daughter swear. Patrick, I'll be in the car. Goodbye, Alexis."

"Vroom vroom bitches!" She yelped as they walked away.

While David carried his yawning daughter out to the car, strapping her into her booster seat, Patrick stayed behind and slipped a ten-dollar bill out from his pocket and into Alexis' hand.

"Here's the ten bucks, thanks for teaching Sophie that, I knew it would bother him."

"Of course, Patrick, boop!"

Hey humans! I hope you enjoyed this oneshot! Feel free to leave me some requests and don't forget that I love you all!