Youkoso Jitsuryoku no Reactions Anime

SS Kei Karuizawa-A scar that would never heal

A/N-Sorry, people here from the future:(

                      "If you gaze into the abyss,

                     the abyss gazes back at you."

<Quickly come to my room! >

<Okay>

My heart started beating wildly when I saw his reply.

Ayanokouji Kiyotaka.

He is my boyfriend and the person I love most in my life.

He might be aloof and a little socially awkward, but whenever I need him most, he would save me.

However the recent things I saw about him made me feel scared.

I always knew he thinks people as nothing but tools.

Those eyes filled with nothing but darkness...

Thinking back, the recent days and the events that passed are just like a dream.

The entity...the secrets...and the truths.

After watching them, a part of me is scared.

'Does he love me or am I just a tool for him ?'

 Ding-dong

The ringing of the doorbell woke me from my thoughts.

I opened the door and saw the person in my thoughts standing outside-

"Hello Kei."

He said wih the same poker face and entered my room.

'Mou! This is so unfair. I am thinking about all these things and he is  as usual.'

Thinking about it, isn't this the first boy in my room ?

My breathing started getting faster and I could hear my heart beating loudly.

He didn't say anything about how I called him or why I called him. He just asked me how I was and started talking about trivial things.

But I quite enjoyed these small talks and gibberigs between us couple. 

The time passed unknowingly and it was almost time for him to leave.

"So why did you call me Kei?" he asked me finally.

I suppressed my doubts and fears in my heart and looked at his eyes.

I asked in a trembling voice -

"K-Kiyotaka. Do you love me?"

He said nothing and then got close to me.

He suddenly hugged me gently and whispered in my ears-

"I love you Kei. I will always love you."   

 Warmth surged in my heart and I felt my face getting hoter.

"A-ah. I-I also..."

I couldn't finish my sentence in embbarasement and pushed him away.

But he pulled me and once again embraced me tightly.

I could feel his heart beat.

Ba-dump. Ba-dump.

We stayed like this for a long time.

"Say it again." I said in a very low voice.

"I love you."

"Again."

"I love you."

"Again."

"I love you."

"Again."

"I lo-"

I looked up and stared straight in his eyes quiveringly.

I always thought his eyes were filled with deep, endless darkness.

 But I was wrong.

His eyes didn't contain darkness. Neither were they filled with pain or hatred.

Those eyes were empty. There was nothing in there.

Love. Hate. Light. Darkness.

No.

I could only feel cold indifference from him.

I was in his embrace for so long.

He told me he loved me.

He said he would never leave me.

However his heart...

It continued beating without any ups or downs.

I never felt the smallest change in his heartbeat.

Not even once.

"N-No. Please no."

He didn't say anything. No words were required from him.

He slowly removed himself and started leaving the room.

I collapsed on the ground.

"Wait. P-Please wait"

He turned blind eye to my pleadings and left the room.

"Aaaah. It hurts. It hurts."

'It hurts so much.'

'Why?

'Why? Why? Why? Why? Why?'

He was my saviour. My salvation.

But he abandoned me after giving me the most painful scar of all.

A scar that would never heal.