Terrified

Part 10 (FINAL)

You froze in Raph's arms, breaths becoming uneven as the movie carried on. He had no idea what movie was picked for the night. Nor did he care. His mission: to confess all, hoping beyond hope that you wouldn't run away from him. He supposed he could always keep you trapped in his embrace, never to leave him. But he figured you wouldn't like that much if you did decide to leave.

Eventually, after what seemed an eternity, you relaxed. Not long after that, he heard soft snores rise to his ears. He decided that was his cue to carry you to bed. His bed. And this time he laid down next to you, more than a little unwilling to let you out of his sight, hopeful for tomorrow.

He laid there, intent on watching you sleep peacefully- just until he had to go on patrol. When you snuggled closer into his chest, his heart soared. Hair fell across your face and with a shaky hand he gently, carefully tucked it behind your ear. You sighed, stopping his heart. Vaguely, he wondered what he could possibly do to win you over. Eventually, he allowed himself to rest his arm around your waist, hoping it didn't crush you.

After a half an hour or so, Leo knocked lightly on his door, signalling it was time to go above ground. Reluctantly, Raph removed his arm from on top of you, but you latched on- stopping him cold, afraid he woke you up. After a few seconds he realized you were still sleeping, slowly he slid his arm out of your grip and tip-toed out of his room without a glance over his shoulder. Although it didn't seem to help the temptation to crawl back into bed with you.

Once out of the sewers they flew rooftop to rooftop, looking for thugs, Foot, Kraang- anything to make the night go faster. Thankfully, his brothers left him alone, but that also made it a quiet night. Which allowed his mind to work on overdrive. Distracting him with thoughts of you: the smell of your hair, your soft skin, your curves, the way you felt in his arms- so small in his grasp. Granted, most humans were small compared to him and his brothers.

His brothers noticed his lack of concentration. He had fell behind several times at this point and instead of shaking him out of his reverie, they stood on a rooftop and waited for him to notice they were waiting on him.

"Wha'?" Raph said once he noticed his brothers staring at him. "Did somethin' happen?"

"No," Leo shook his head and slapped a hand on Raph's shoulder. "But what do you say we head back to the lair?"

"This early?" he asked, confused and hopeful to crawl back into bed with you. "We just left."

"Yeah, but it's been a quiet night-"

"Yeah, dude. I have a personal record to break on my new game. I say let's go!"

"And I'm in the middle of-"

"See?" Leo interrupted Donnie before he could go into any detail over whatever experiment he was working on and hopped to the next roof toward the lair. "We all have something at home we wanna get back to, so let's go."

Raph happily followed, anxious to get back home and into bed with you. If you were still there anyway. The thought had him back in the lair a few minutes before his brothers.

~~~~~~~~~~

I woke up chilly and alone, per usual- and maybe a little confused as to why I was in Raph's bed when I remembered I had fallen asleep during the movie- when light streamed into the darkened room, Raph's familiar shadow on the wall. I closed my eyes and evened out my breathing as I feigned sleep, wanting him to share the bed with me, but also knowing it was unlikely that he would.

The bed dipped.

A heavy arm wrapped around my waist, pulling me into a hard chest. I swallowed the squeak that threatened to reveal my ruse and willed my heart to stop its thundering, afraid he would know I was awake.

His sigh tickled the hair on my head as he settled in.

I waited several minutes for Raph to say something. Anything. Until I finally gave up and attempted to truly fall asleep. Obviously I wasn't going to learn any deep, dark secrets this night. I was disappointed, but secretly ecstatic that he was here, holding me as if his life depended on it.

"So beautiful," he whispered a moment before I succumbed to darkness. "Do ya know that?"

I wanted to tell him no, that I didn't know he thought that, but stayed silent, hoping for more. Always hoping for more.

"I'm sorry," he rasped, still whispering as his hold tightened around me. "Fer everythin'. Fer makin' ya think I don' care. Fer not tellin' ya I care."

It took every fiber of my being to continue my steady breathing.

"Last night," he paused, taking a shaky breath as he nuzzled into the crook of my neck. "I wanted ta kill the lowlife tha' made ya cry."

I told myself to keep my breathing steady as a tear fell; and another; and another; and- I squeezed my eyes tight, willing the tears to stop to no avail.

"I hope ya don't leave 'cause of me. I-" HIs voice broke, deep and gravelly as he pushed through. "I couldn't live knowin' ya don't wan' anythin' ta do with me."

"Then why do you stay away?" I cracked, voice barely audible to my ears.

He tensed, stiff as a board. I waited on bated breath for his answer before I turned to face him. A difficult feat considering his giant arm across my waist that he refused to lift, even just a tiny bit, off of me.

"Raph?" My voice shook as I met his widened gaze.

"I- uh- I-" he cleared his throat. "How much did ya hear?"

"All of it," I stared at his plastron, embarrassed, and traced the lines. "But I liked it-"

He gasped. "Ya did?"

"Yeah," I chanced a glance up at his emerald eyes and was unable to look away, glued to to his questioning gaze. "I've always liked you. Felt safe around you. But you wouldn't ever really talk to me after that night you saved me and I thought you hated me for it. That I was a bother-"

"Yer not a bother," he growled out, holding me in tight embrace. "Don't evah think tha', okay? I'll always watch ovah ya. If somethin' evah happened ta ya, Y/n. I don't know wha' I would do. I couldn' live with myself if ya got hurt."

"Okay," I whispered into his chest.

"Good," he sighed out, nodding.

"G'night," I said in a sleepy whisper, suddenly exhausted after all the emotional turmoil. Happy this wouldn't be my last night here. Relieved Raph didn't see me as a burden, but so much more- even if he didn't say it in those exact words. Quietly, I listened to his deep breaths as they lulled me into sleep.