Robert/Nj boy imagines

Anxiety .M.P.

WORD COUNT: 2493

Warning:

This is a sensitive imagine, it's a little different from the other ones I have wrote it is also something I struggle with on a daily basis it's hard for me to explain and to deal with. So for me, no one understands or people think it's not as bad as I make it, sometimes people say I'm over reacting and I'm fine, and sometimes they say you'll get over it someday. It's not as easy as you think. So I wanted to write and imagine about it since I feel like it's important.

If any of you experience similar problems or anything like that this imagine Is just for you

Please don't send hate to me or judge me the experiences in this imagine are things people go through on a daily basis

Y/N's POV

I was glad it was finally the weekend I didn't have to study for any test or write any essays. It was finally my time to relax. I was sitting at the island in my kitchen looking through my favorite magazine when I heard a familiar voice it was my boyfriend mattia

M: hey y/n

Y/n: hey, I smiled at him

M: I was wondering if you wanted to come with me to do some shopping? We need more food for the house. Plus I wanted to go to the shoe store. We can get dinner afterwards if you would like. He said as he kissed my forehead walking to the living room to watch tv.

Yk today won't be so bad it will be fun. Having a nice dinner, going shopping. It would be exciting. Right? Well

Wrong

Every time mattia suggested going somewhere, didn't always go as a planned I would always be to distracted all I could think about were there was too many people or it was to loud or there was way too many things happening at once. It was to much for me. I zoned out, completely ignoring mattia.

Then there would be arguments between me and mattia. He never knew how I felt. He would always say I was making up excuses to not go with him anywhere or I was being over dramatic. Did I ever tell him? No. I mean how would I tell him about this?

I'm scared of people

I'm scared of being judged

What if I do something embarrassing? Like trip and fall

I'm scared of all the different things happening at once

Then of course there's the fans, even if they weren't there I would still be in a what I called scary situation

I mean mattia was so sweet and caring. But how would he feel after I tell him? Or how would he understand? He would think I'm being ignorant.

Even in high school, I had a fear of going to classes. I would simply skip them and hide in the bathroom due to the panic of having people stare at you and just the amount of people in the one little room.

But I always wondered. Did people feel the same? Did they feel like me in situations like the ones I've mentioned?

" Y/n " mattia said as I came back to reality

" yes mattia " I asked in response.

M: do you want to come with me? I would like the company.

Y/n: if it's ok I want to stay here. I said as a reply

M: please baby, It's lonely without you I always love for you to be with me.