Fighter: A Love Story

Realization.

Danni.

                “I’ll call you tomorrow, okay?” Zach leans his head out the window. I nod, thanking the blacked out sky for hiding my red face. He pulls me in for a kiss and my whole body is capture by him. When he drives off I drag my feet up the drive way and into my house. I slam the door behind me and slide down, covering my mouth. Sex! I’ve had sex before! I just did it! My face is burning up! It was so scary, yet I loved it. I finally get up and go on to my bedroom.

                I have a boyfriend. He’s older than me, he’s an adult. I see my gray sweater and slide it over my head on to my chilled body. How come I never read anything about Zach, never seen trace of him in my room? It’s odd. I hang myself over my bed. It must be really late now. I look over to the clock 2:34 a.m. “Ugh!” I groan.  “I can still feel you.” Every inch of my body still has your touch, my hair still has your scent, and my mind is filled with thoughts of you. Is this what you call love?

                Falling off my bed, I go over to my mirror and stare at myself. My black hair messy and all over the place, my smeared black makeup around my pale blue eyes, the love bites on my neck. I touch my inner thigh knowing there are some there too. It’s scary looking at yourself in the mirror. At some point it because a trance. Sucking you in with those evil eyes I’ve never knew I had. I’m afraid of myself. Of what my evil eyes has witnessed. I feel as if I’m staring at someone else. And I am… At least it feels that way.

                At the corner of my eye I see my phone light up. It’s only to warn me about low battery, but I still grab it and fly onto my bed. Reading though my messages, and finding nothing interesting, I notice I have a missed call from Kobi. Should I call him back? I look at the time again. “No, it’s too late.” I should probably get some sleep myself. I yawn as I go over to my lamp and turn it off. My bed swallows me when I tuck myself in. Slowly I should fall asleep.

                                                                                      ***

                “Stop! Stop! It hurts!” The back of my neck burns and it seems as if something is piercing though it. “Awh, shut up!” A rugged voice makes me tear up. I’m turned around and Zach stares at me with black eyes. My tears make my vision blurry. “Please.” I beg, knowing that it’ll do no good. Then why do I plead? I don’t understand? Is it the only thing I can do? I feel so weak and it only makes me cry more. I close my eyes, but there soon wide open when he slaps my face. “Look at me you, cunt!” I dare look at this monster, at this man whom I’m in love with.

But, I do. He laughs and pulls out a pocket knife. Running across my neck, trying to make me scared. “Show no fear.” A small voice inside my head whispers. “You’re a fighter. You’re strong.” Again I hear it as I feel a sting and the smell of blood hits my nose. “Now…fight!” As if energy was given to me out of nowhere, I shoot up and push my whole body over him. I’ve got him pinned down as I take the knife in my boney fingers. I run it across his neck just like he did me. I see the look of fear in his eyes. “What’s a matter?” My voice isn’t shaken, isn’t fearful. “You don’t like it?” I run it across his chest. “Well, I do…I wanna see how fast your blood can pour out.” I cut from the bottom of his right side to the top.

He helplessly yelps in pain, but no one can hear you. No one’s here. No one cares. His blood drips from the knife and I lick it clean. I can see it in his eyes that he’s dying… just like I’ve always wanted. I always needed. I laugh as I slowly lick his neck and when I reach his lips I kiss them, just as he loses life. Then I just stare at him, at what I’ve done. I close my eyes, but I can’t stop the painful tears from flowing down my cheeks, onto his dead, bloody body. I throw the knife and get off him. Crawling to the corner of the bed I huddle myself in it…and just sit there…silently crying.