Scars {G-Idle}

Chapter 5

Minnie huddled in the corner, whimpering, her head wedged in the corner against the padded wall. Dark bags were forming under her eyes, but she couldn't sleep at all. Every time she closed her eyes in this place, she could see them all. Without another of her group around, she couldn't bear being alone. She closed her eyes and whimpered as she saw them again.

"Oh, Minnie, you slut. Take it, bitch. Take it!"

"You're nothing but our little fuck toy. You'll be so happy when we give you a good baby in your belly."

"An abortion, huh? You must really want us to take you again."

She screamed, kicking her legs, and covered her ears as she opened her eyes once more. "No, no, no! No more!"

"Minnie? Minnie, are you alright?" Jin knocked on her door. "It's morning and your friends should be arriving soon."

"M-morning?" She blinked. Minnie knew she'd survived this night of suffering, but what about the next? Would she ever just be a normal girl again?

No, because they made you theirs and made sure you would never forget it.

"It's morning, honey. What would you like for breakfast this morning? We have pancakes!"

"That's fine..."

Jin brought in the food and sighed as she saw Minnie weakly scratching at her skin. "Sweetheart, we cut your nails for a reason. Is there anything you want to talk about?"

"Can't... sleep..." she gasped weakly. "I see them... I always see them... I just wanna be dead..."

"And we've been over this. Our job is to help you. But if you aren't feeling comfortable cuddling today, the other girls are here."

"Hey, Minnie." Yuqi smiled as she walked in and the rest of G-Idle filed in behind her. "How are you feeling?"

"How do you think?" She pushed the plate away and hugged her knees as she flopped onto the floor. "I want to die."

"You look exhausted..." Soyeon took a knee beside her. "Did you sleep?"

"No! I can't close my eyes without feeling it again! I haven't slept in so long unless I passed out!" Minnie covered her face, wailing. "I can never do anything again without seeing it and feeling it all... f-feeling them inside me... s-stretching me..." She paled and began to hyperventilate slightly. "No... no more... just kill me, please!"

"Minnie, please look at me." The older carefully removed her hands and cupped her face. "I know you can do this. It will take time, but I know you will get better."

"How? I'm not a girl who will fight the people who hurt me. I just want... I want to take the easy way out and kill myself..."

"Oh, Minnie, do you know how much it pains me to hear those words out of your mouth? We love you and we want you to stay with us."

"But how... how... how am I going to be able to look at every male face without seeing a mask of hatred? How am I ever going to dance without feeling pain everywhere in my body? How can I ever go to the bathroom without seeming l-like my holes are going to explode with blood...?"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, that's what it feels like?" Soyeon blanched. "I know you're getting medical help, but if it's that serious, it should look like an ICU room in here."

"I can't... I can't go back to a real hospital... that... that's one of the places they came after me..."

"You mean... it happened when you fainted and was in the hospital for a week because of your anemia?"

"Y-yes... oh god, it was horrible... they drugged me so I couldn't scream... the pain was unbearable, but during that time, they left no trace of it on me... s-so I was let out later and it was so horrible and overwhelming..."

"But your dancing... it never suffered." Miyeon blinked. "I don't understand... oh no!!"

"I can't do this!" Minnie blubbered. "It's too much and I will never ever ever heal! I'm too weak and stupid for this!"

Each time she talked herself down hit like a knife in Yuqi's heart.

"How could I not have known about this?" she whispered. "I care for you so much, Minnie, and we share a room, but it was all for nothing..."

"I'm scared..."

"We all are, love, but we'll get through this," Shuhua sighed. "Together."