╰☆☆ days went by, then weeks followed afterwards. but ni-ki hasn't seen the older in a whole month. he was worried it was because of his confession that scared him away..or worse sunno didn't feel the same way. but all his questions were answered the day the mailman handed him a fancy envelope. huh. i haven't had a letter in a long time.. ni-ki opened the letter, shocked to see it was from the very boy he was just thinking about.
hello ni-ki, you're probably wondering why i didn't talk to you anymore. well it's not that i don't like you too..it's just that too much has happened in my life.
i won't go too deep but i've been abused my whole life. mostly from my very own family. i also have some problems not many people suspect a cheerful boy like me has.
it was when i was ten years old i was diagnosed with depression. it was also around the time my father married my step mother and i had an older brother. so i spend my whole life covering up my true thoughts and feelings. i had medicine i used to take for my problems but my mother in law said there was no need to because she thinks i won't be able to "man up" if i need care. but I dislike my father the most. he knows what i go through but he doesn't do anything whatsoever to help. he just shuts up and let's this happen. the first time i tried to end it all was last year and the only thing that stopped me was my own will. it wasn't much i'm very grateful for that because then i won't have met you
they say the prettiest smiles can hide the most agonizing pain.
and I felt like that was why no one would suspect my traumatizing past.
you were my reason for my real smiles ni-ki. when i was with you i felt something no one has every gave me and that was your love for me.
by the time you get this i probably won't be here anymore. i've lived with it for too long. and today was my breaking point.
i'm so sorry...i really don't deserve you.. ..just know that this is not your fault but mines.. ..i have too many problems..with very little solutions.
but i want you to know that the time i spend with you was the most memorable in my seventeen years of living. so thank you so much for that ni-ki, i love you so much for that. i wish only the best for you and your future and i only want you to keep smiling when i'm gone because your smile is soo beautiful..
lots of love- kim sunno.
by the end of the letter ni-ki completely broke down. "Why sunno why!" he cried. he felt like he was drowning in his tears that kept pouring like a never ending waterfall.
