By Your Side | Cha Eunwoo

Part 1

"You see, I'm not the talkative type. But I want someone who is willing to listen. I want someone who is willing to see my ugliest side and still be by my side, you know?" he sighs at the camera, his mind far away. "I'm not making any sense, am I? Forget it."

He switches the camera off. 

***

After filming wraps up for the night, Cha Eunwoo walks the streets of Itaewon, Seoul. Despite it being nearly 2 am in the morning, there are tons of people of the street. Itaewon is known for its late-night bars and nightclubs. It's not particularly 'lively' at this time of night, but alive nonetheless. 

Eunwoo kicks a rock that's beneath his feet. It lands somewhere down the sidewalk.

The late October chill settles in his bones and he shivers, stuffing his hands into his coat. He keeps his head down and continues walking. No one pays him any attention since he's got his mask and beanie on.

He walks till his feet begin to ache. His body screams with exhaustion. Filming started at 4 am last morning and he was stuck at the set since. He hadn't had time to sleep or even to rest, except when he was getting his hair and makeup done. In the evening, he had practice with his group members for their upcoming comeback and then back to filming it was. 

Suddenly, he stops. Looks up. It is a residential area and seems like everyone is asleep. It's dark and there are no street signs or lamps or anything. Where the hell is he? Ironically, his phone's out of charge and no one around to offer him any directions. 

Panic goes as quickly as it comes. He's too tired to find his way back to the dorms. No one is around. He's alone, in an old and dirty neighbourhood. 

Then, he lowers himself into a comfortable squat, rests his head into his arms and begins crying. It is perhaps the thought that no one is watching him that brings his solace as he releases his pent-up frustration. 

He cries and cries and cries. 

It would feel good if he wasn't hurting so bad. 

Minutes feel like hours before a gentle hand rests on his back. "There, there."

The hand startles Eunwoo but he's too embarrassed to lift his head. So he remains in his position as his shoulders continue to shake. A girl-- judging by the pitch of the voice, rubs small circular patterns onto his back. 

She waits for him to calm down a little bit, but after five more minutes, she's certain that she'll be late to work if she stays any longer. But she can't just leave the poor guy in the street. Who knows what he's going through? What if he hurts himself after she leaves. 

It's awkward to ask him, but she does anyway. She places her free hand on Eunwoo's arm. "Hey, it's not safe for you to be out here alone. How about you come with me? I work just two minutes from here."

The kindness of the stranger touches Eunwoo deeply. It feels good receiving consolation rather than people telling him to get himself together because he's on camera. 

His members and managers may be wondering where he is gone, but it doesn't matter. There is no way Eunwoo can go back right now. He lifts his head to meet the girl's. Her kind eyes shine down at him. 

"You wanna come?" she asks, "I'll make you some hot chocolate or some ramyeon. Whatever you like."

He nods. 

The girls assists him as he stands up. His body eels so numb that he can't walk straight. He stumbled a bit, but the girl's arms shoots around his back and she holds onto him. Eunwoo knows he's not the lightest guy to carry around but she doesn't say a peep as she supports his tall, heavy build of her small one. His pride is just a little hurt that he's relying on a girl to help him but his legs are like jello.  

Together, like that, they begin walking. "My job is just around the corner," she points at to a small 24/7 convinience store a few hundred meters away. "You can rest there, okay? Just hang in there."

Eunwoo opens his mouth to thank her but only choked sounds come out. 

The door jingles as they enter. Thankfully, it's empty except an old man grouched at the cashier. "Katie, you're late. Uh-- what-- who is this man?"

The girl doesn't say anything but her body moves underneath his. She's gesturing at the old man. He reads the gestures quietly, glances at Eunwoo and nods impassively. Slinging his shoulder bad over, he passes by them and leaves the store. "You pay for anything you give him," he calls over his shoulder begrudgingly. 

"What did you say to him?" Eunwoo croaks out. 

"Oh, nothing, don't worry. He's the owner, and he was covering for me for my break. I had to rush home quickly for. something and then he wanted to go home and..." she pauses. "I'm gonna stop babbling."

Eunwoo doens't say anything as she leads him behind the cashier desk where the old man previously sat. Along with a rickety stool, there is a make-shit cot from wooden crates and pillows. The girl points to the cot, "here."

She lets go of him and Eunwoo climbs into the tight cot and rolls over to face the wall, his back to the girl. He has to bend his knees to fit. The girl disappears for a moment behind a curtain screen and returns with an apron and a blanket. Eunwoo's eyes begin closing. He feels her place the blanket over him, covering his shoulders and pulling it down to cover his feet. The cot is extremely uncomfortable and the blanket smells of dust. He doesn't even notice.

He falls asleep.