Hetalia X Reader Collection

I-G-G-Y (Drunk!England X Reader)

"HEY (NAME)! LET'S DO SOME KARAOKE!" Alfred yelled, literally blowing out your eardrum.

"OW, DAMMIT!" You clapped a hand over your ear and glared at one of your best friends. "I know it's loud in here, but you don't have to scream, for fuck's sake!"

Alfred just grinned and grabbed your hand. "C'mon, (Nickname), it'll be fun~!"

"Karaoke? With you? Hell no!" You pulled your arm out of his grip, choosing instead to look past the clumps of partying countries and into the kitchen, where Lovino, Mathias, and Arthur were getting drunk off their arses. You sighed. "Why is it when you host a party at Arthur's house, you always make sure to put out enough wine for Arthur to get bloody drunk off of?"

Alfred adjusted his glasses and shrugged. "I don't know what you're talking about," he said innocently. But you could see his lips twitch as he tried not to smile.

"Alfred, what happens if he goes after some innocent girl while he's intoxicated!?" You crossed your legs and took a sip of your own wine while glowering at the American over the edge of your glass.

"Pfffft, there's no one here he'd want to go after except for you—our mom!" He laughed nervously and looked away.

"Um....I'm going to choose not to take offense at that, considering I'm a country and the only parental figure I've ever had is Feliciano's grandfather." You glanced back over at the kitchen and saw that Arthur was gone. "Shit, Alfred, he's missing! What if Francis went after him and they're having sex in the guest bedroom!?"

Alfred rolled his eyes. "Chill, (Name). You know that Francis isn't gay, even if he does make all those jokes. I'm sure Arthur'd rather have you than Francis, anyway." He winked.

"Whatever," you scoffed, but you couldn't ignore the way your heart sped up.

Alfred looked back over at the huge-ass stereo that he brought over to Arthur's house and was reminded of why he came to you in the first place. "(Name), please do some karaoke with me? PLEASE!?"

"Dammit, Al, I said—!"

"BLOODY HELL ALFRED! YOUR STEREO IS STRANGLING ME!"

"—What?" You turned to look over at the music system and nearly spit out your wine from laughter. Arthur was tangled up in the black, grey, and white cords that were powering the stereo and plugging it into the wall. You started to smile as he attempted to move, then promptly fell over, due to the wires wrapped around his feet. Standing, you set your wineglass down on the coffee table and walked over to where Arthur was struggling, trying to stifle your giggles. "Arthur, why are you messing around with Alfred's stereo?"

"I *hic* was only trying to *hic* find the bathroom!" he whined, face flushed from the several pints of alcohol he must have consumed. "But these bloody snakes *hic* attacked me!" He stopped struggling and gazed up at you with puppy dog eyes. "Will you help me up, (Name)?" His emerald irises sparkled with tears.

When'd he learn to beg like that? you thought absently as you extended your arms out to him. Slipping a hand beneath each of his own arms, you sighed and shook your head as you lifted him out of the mess of cables. "Arthur Kirkland, what am I going to do with you?"

"I can think of a few things~" he whispered suddenly, causing you to nearly drop him.

"Wh-What!?" Your face erupted into a fierce blush as you set him on his feet.

"I said, I can think of a few things I'd like for you to do with me, love~" he repeated, smirking. His slur had faded, although his accent was heavy, and he was no longer hiccuping.

You backed up a pace and muttered, "You're drunk, Art. Say that to me when you're sober, and I'll think about it."

Arthur opened his mouth to say something, but was interrupted by Antonio, who had gotten up on the fireplace and was now announcing, "Amigos! Gilbert, Francis, Alfred, and I have decided that we're doing karaoke next! So everyone start lining up to sign up to sing! Oh, and (Name), chica?"

You froze in your attempt to sneak out the backdoor. "Ah....yes, Antonio?"

"You have to stick around!"

"Why me?!" you squeaked, "I have to get home! I....I've got a ton of paperwork to do, a-and I'm not sure—"

"NO EXCUSES!" Gilbert roared, and picked you up by the waist and threw you over his shoulder. He charged over to one of Arthur's comfy armchairs and pushed you down into it, then snapped his fingers at Francis. "Rope."

"WHY THE HELL DO YOU HAVE—!?"

Gilbert ignored you and started to tie you to the chair once Francis had handed over the rope. "There," he said, looking satisfied. "Now you can't escape."

"Gilbert Beilschmidt, so help me Holy Rome—"

"Aw, c'mon dudette! It'll be fun! Just stick around to watch!" Alfred pleaded, staring at you with big baby-blue eyes.

You tried to resist, but you couldn't fight those teary eyes. "Fuck it, fine! Al, the next time you do that, I'm going to—"

"GREAT!" Alfred dashed away into the crowd, and you rolled your (e/c) eyes.

"Short attention span as always." Sighing, you played with a lock of your (h/l) (h/c) hair as your gaze wandered the length of the room. Seeing nothing of interest, you relaxed against the chair and closed your eyes.