Being Nonbinary (Trans and Nonbinary Problems)

Names

Every trans person has some story about how they got their names. They can range anywhere from "it's the other version of my name", or "what my parents would have called me" to a random noun you just identify with.

Some people like to remain close to their birth names, some name themselves after people they admire, some just pick names that sound nice. There are many people who keep their birth names (any name is gender-neutral, someone called John says she's a girl? John is a girl's name. No one has to change their name or have names that traditionally fit their gender identity). All these reasons are valid, but let me tell y'all how I chose my name.

My decision was made in three steps:

1. I was watching YouTube compilations of queer TikToks, as one does, and I came across one entitled something like "enby's choosing their names". It was the first opening cords to a song and the word "rock". I laughed 'cause, yeah, it is a bit of a thing for non binary people to name themselves nouns. I didn't think about it much and stored the memory at the back of my mind, in a folder labeled "Kinda funny queer stuff".

2. My mom forced me to go hiking one day. I was feeling really dysphoric so I was wearing a hoody which does not work with the sweltering heats of our summers. At some point, I was tired, thirsty, and boiling and so I sat down on a rock. My name didn't usually cause me much dysphoria but that day it was really bugging me. I thought about possible alternatives I was reminded of the TikTok by my makeshift seat.

3.  But I still wasn't done, I liked Rock, but it wasn't a classy enough, or namey enough name for me. Until I remembered my second favorite character in a second-rate book series I'd read was named Roque. This checked all the boxes for me; literary reference, sounds like the noun rock, sounds kind of like baroque (that's it, I don't have many boxes).

And now I stand before you, Roque, an idiot who picked a name because it made them laugh.