Four out of Six

~Chapter 5~

"Noya! And Asahi!" Suga was all smiles as his two friends walked in. "It's been a few days. How are you guys? How's the team? I heard from Daichi you're all planning to visit tomorrow when I'm released, and that I should act surprised."

It was a couple of days after the summer camp had ended. Suga had been transferred from the hospital in Tokyo to the one back in Sendai. All the team knew was that he was staying for a few days until he was stable and the doctors were able to run a few tests.

Suga smiled. Asahi looked like he was on the verge of throwing up. Noya was livid.

"Why the hell did you stop chemo if you're not cured yet?"

Sugawara sighed. "I figured that's why you came."

Asahi looked down at his feet in shame. "I'm sorry. I know you didn't want me telling anyone..."

"It's fine. You've always been bad at keeping secrets. And if anyone were to figure out, it would be you, Nishinoya." Suga turned to Noya. "Yes, it's true. I'm no longer continuing my chemotherapy. I just met with my parents and my doctors, and we agreed that this would be for the best."

"Why? Because you're better?"

"Nah," he replied with a laugh. "Because it's easier."

Nishinoya was practically vibrating with anger. "So you're just going to take the easy way out? Is that it?"

"Noya," warned Asahi. "Please."

"The Suga-san I know wouldn't just give up like that! He would fight with everything he's got!"

Suga stared out the window. "He would, wouldn't he?"

"THEN WHY AREN'T YOU FIGHTING? WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU GIVING UP?"

"Noya!" Asahi began to scold, but was stopped by Suga. His friend shook his head before giving Nishinoya a sad smile.

"Because I'm not getting better."

The silence that followed was deadly. Nishinoya was standing, seething with rage, but underneath all of the anger Suga could see another emotion in his eyes.

Fear.

"What's that supposed to mean?" he asked, voice impossibly quiet.

"It," Suga started, then stopped. He swallowed. "It means what I just said. I'm not going to get better. I'm going to die. I'm going to die, and there's nothing in this world that can stop that. I've been lying to everyone when I said I was getting better. It felt like it for a bit too, especially when I was still able to go to school and practice. But it's been getting worse. The cancer is spreading, and even aggressive chemotherapy could only do so much. The doctor's told me it's terminal."

Noya was just shaking his head back and forth, eyes vacant.

"You're lying."

"Why would I lie about something as valuable as a human life?" There was a steely edge to Suga's voice that made Nishinoya flinch a bit. The setter's expression softened almost immediately. "I'm sorry. I was just informed they weren't able to stop the cancer from spreading. It's now reached Stage Four."

"What does that mean?" Noya's voice was so small. It was so unlike him.

Asahi was the one to speak first. "There's nothing after Stage Four."

Suga nodded. "Exactly."

Noya teetered on his feet, then took a seat in the plastic chair by the bed. It took him a full minute to ask, "What exactly did the doctor say?"

"I was told it would be best I no longer play volleyball, and that I should consider dropping out of school within the next month or so. After that, I'll be on medication to help with the pain, the sleepiness, and the nausea the painkillers cause."

"Is it really that bad?" Noya asked.

Suga was silent for several seconds.

"I have less than a year left," he said. "Optimistically around six months."

Noya backed up from the bed. Suga had turned away. Asahi was crying.

"You can tell them all," said Suga, voice cracking. "The team, that is. They'll figure it out sooner or later. I'd rather they know."

~

The team visit was one of the bleakest events of Suga's life. The false merriment was dropped the moment he called them out, scolding the boys about being honest before smiling and giving each of them a hug. It was after several painful minutes of masked emotions that someone had the courage to bring up the real reason why they were all gathered there.

"You really are going to die, aren't you Sugawara-san," Hinata finally said.

He nodded sadly. "It looks like it. And don't make that expression! It doesn't suit you, Hinata-kun."

Tsukishima wasn't pleased.

"How can you say something like that?" he asked.

"It's okay. I've accepted it already. I had a good life. There's nothing to complain about, except maybe not getting that starting position this year." He winked at Kageyama, who turned away quickly.

"But—"

"Besides," he cut in, "there's no point wasting what time I do have left wishing for things I can't have. I might as well enjoy what I actually did."

Tsukishima didn't say anything. He just stood and left the room. Yamaguchi looked conflicted, glancing between the door and Suga. The setter waved him away.

"He's probably just upset. You can go check on him if you want."

Yamaguchi nodded, then left. He didn't return for over twenty minutes. By the time the freckled boy was able to coax Tsukishima out of the locked bathroom stall and back to the setter's room visitation hours were done for the day.

"Don't worry!" Suga said brightly. "I should be back at practice tomorrow! Though I'll be on the sidelines."

Tsukishima just nodded, bowed, and left. He was the last to go. No one commented on how red his eyes were.