Kintsugi // ATEEZ [Ishihara Sequel] ✔

44 Stra-tea-gy

"She was telling the truth. You are pregnant, and it's been a few weeks. Though I still can't determine whether they're twins; maybe we can trust her on that."

Akira leans back against the chair, hearing the confirmation from the palace doctor makes her feel like it's more surreal, something that she couldn't imagine she'd have to find out alone. Now that she's hearing it from the palace doctor, from another person twice, makes her feel somewhat melancholic knowing that she can't share the news with Seonghwa. She lets out a heavy breath as she nods.

"Thank you," she says simply. "I'm guessing that's why I could see the colours fading sometimes?"

Dr. Kee presses his lips together, mulling over her reasoning before slowly nodding. "Your inability to see colours is way beyond my understanding, but considering when you started experiencing it, it lined up."

She can only sigh as she remembers the last morning the two of them woke up together, while Seonghwa was still well that she had already started experiencing it. She only brushed it away, hoping that it would go away; if only she knew earlier what it meant. Now that all her symptoms are confirmed, she doesn't know what to feel. When she stands up though, the palace doctor quickly reminds her.

"Considering what you've been through," he utters, "Your body might not be accustomed to it, but you pulled through it, even more than other average expectant mothers. It's a miracle that you were able to go through what you did while you were carrying two lives with you. But now," he pauses, "now that you know you're expecting, I hope that you can take it easy. Don't force yourself too much."

She merely nods as she gives a weak smile, her mind going to different places at once, from the condition of the kingdom to Seonghwa, from the fact that she's now pregnant to the knowledge that Sara could only cure one of them. She leaves the doctor's room, pausing every now and then as she walks, unsure of whether she'd be telling Seonghwa about it even though he might not give a reaction.

From what Sara has told her, she's sure that Seonghwa can hear everything she's been saying to him even though he didn't react, and now that Sara has told him how Akira wouldn't be affected by the curse, maybe he won't push her away like he did that day. She decides to go to Seonghwa's room anyway, even more certainly as she has known now that her black blood acts as a protective factor.

She arranges her steps to his room, now becoming more aware of the condition of her body. She has to make sure to not make it that obvious so no one else would suspect it; the doctor has promised her that he'll keep her pregnancy a secret. At least until Seonghwa is cured, until she can tell him the news.

She pauses in front of the door, smiling to the guards who are now dutifully unlocking the door for her. She steps into the room to see the same condition he's in, but she'd like to believe that his eyes now hold more hope, that they recognize her as she walks towards the bed. She smiles as she sits down next to the bed like she always does, this time her lips feeling heavy to even say anything.

She mulls over whether she'd want to tell the news about her pregnancy now, hoping that somewhere in there he's listening to her, and is reacting happily over the news. Instead she merely grabs his hand, relieved that even though it's still cold, he doesn't pull away.

"Thank you," she finally says, "for protecting me even when I wasn't aware." She stops as she wants to say thank you for protecting our future children, as she decides against it and says something else instead. "Sara said she's going to cure you, and after that we can..." she takes a deep breath, "be happy once again, hmm?" She rubs her thumb slowly on the back of his palm, ignoring how cold he feels. "Although..." she hesitates, "I feel bad because I'm only being selfish. She could only cure one of you and- I prioritized you. I hope there's at least someone that can say that I'm doing the right thing."