19 | without you by my side

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"this life will go by in the blink of an eye, but i wouldn't wanna spend it without you by my side

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"this life will go by in the blink of an eye, but i wouldn't wanna spend it without you by my side. the clouds are gonna roll, the earth's gonna shake, but i'll be your shelter through the wind and the rain."

- from the ground up; dan & shay

• • •

The jet engine rumbled underneath Steve's feet, the blue sky and clouds whizzing by as the wings of the plane glided through the air. It was a long flight, but it was an even longer three weeks being away from Natasha. His nerves were shot, his pulse spiked, and his heart unsettled as he thought about what he was about to do, to walk away from everything he had built in America... to walk away from being Captain America. It was an easy decision, one he'd made with his heart because his heart wholly belonged to someone, not a mere shield that symbolized a country's freedom.

"I left, Fury." Steve sighed, running his hands over his face. His eyes were heavy with exhaustion, and his mind whirled in circles, but he had to do this. Natasha was worth everything, even if it meant he was giving up everything for her. "We couldn't work out a deal with the government so I threw my shield at them, quite literally, and left." He explained. He had expected Fury to be angry but not this angry. The man had just gotten out of containment after being detained for committing treason in aiding Natasha, but Maria had been working nonstop to swing his release. Steve had figured he wouldn't have been in such a bad mood after his release, but he was evidently mistaken.

"You haven't been able to contact Romanoff in three weeks! You don't know what's going on in Moscow, and you aren't thinking, Rogers. You can't walk away from your life like this!" Fury shouted into the speaker of the phone.

He was at a loss for words. How could he describe his love for Natasha in such a way that Fury would understand he would give up everything just to be with her? It was something so simple - genuine - yet so complicated and twisted that few understood. "I'm sorry, Fury. I am, but I will always be just a phone call away." Steve finally said before he ended the call. He would be landing in Moscow in just a few hours, and he knew that he was entirely underprepared. Fury was right in the sense that Steve truly had no idea what he was walking into, but he knew he would figure everything out just like he always did. When he followed his heart, everything always worked out the way it was supposed to.

The hours crept by, and eventually, the jet began to descend in altitude. Steve was thankful that Tony had let him borrow it and a pilot was waiting in Moscow to fly it back to America. He would miss his friends immensely, but he knew their goodbyes weren't for forever. His friends were Natasha's and eventually, they would see them again. The landing of the jet was effortless with Tony's automated system, and his heart began to race when the wheels rolled to a slow stop. Three weeks. It had been a mere three weeks since he'd seen Natasha. Why was he nervous? It was as if he was meeting her for the first time all over again but under decidedly better circumstances. It was a feeling he'd never felt before, his heart thrumming with love for his woman and hoping that distance hadn't changed the way she felt for him. However, no matter how nervous he was, in his heart, he knew that wouldn't be the case.

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