Father First| An Alan Rickman Story

Mother's Day 2003

Alan Rickman and his daughter, Ashleigh, always celebrated Mother's Day in the most non-traditional way possible. For them, this was a day dedicated to Father/Daughter fun and they absolutely, never, mentioned mothers on Mother's Day. This tradition had begun the year Ashleigh began primary school. There are some things one never forgets, and Alan would never forget the day he decided to create a new way for his daughter to celebrate Mother's Day. That was the day he first saw her experience the true anguish related to not having her mother in her life.

     It was the Friday before Mother's Day and while he tried to not rely on his nanny, Rachel, often, he needed her on this particular afternoon. He had been filming an episode of Fallen Angels and wouldn't be able to make it home in time to pick Ashleigh up from school. He asked Rachel to get her from school and take her home to start her homework.

     When he walked in his front door expecting to take over on homework duty, he instead found his little girl crumpled in Rachel's arms sobbing. Her long brunette hair was sticking to her tear soaked face, she looked absolutely pitiful. He also noticed she was clutching a small group of flowers in her hand. He lifted her up into his arms and cradled her as Rachel handed him a wadded sheet of paper she pulled out of the trash bin. It was a coloring sheet with big block lettering that said, "Happy Mother's Day!" It had scribbles or pink and red crayon all over it.

     "Today one of the assignments for her class was to make a bouquet and card to give to their their mothers for Mother's Day," Rachel said gently, trying not to upset Ashleigh all over again. Alan ripped the page from her hand and immediately threw it back into the trash. He started to swear, but quickly stopped himself to prevent his five year old from learning several new words. He was stopped in his tracks before a rant could even begin when the tiny girl in his arms lifted her head off his shoulder and said, "Everyone had a mother, but me..." the look of pain in her eyes scarred him. The thought of the child he loved more than life itself pretending to make a gift for a mother just so she didn't have to tell anyone about her own mother pierced his heart. He was certain he'd never let anything like that happen again.

     He spent that night having words with his daughter's school and when he finally hung up the phone and had released his anger, Ashleigh walked in. "My friends are making breakfast and presents for their mummy for Mother's Day... can daddies get breakfast and presents too?" The innocence of her question made him chuckle.

     "Of course they can! How about we do breakfast and then you pick somewhere to go and have fun afterwords?"     

     That Sunday morning, Ashleigh presented her father with a bowl of brightly colored, cotton candy flavored cereal and the flowers she had brought from school. After having the breakfast she "made", they went out to the park, a movie, and dinner. Thus began their Mother's Day tradition.

     Now, 10 years later, Alan is sitting on his back patio dressed and ready with his bag at his side, mentally preparing himself to tell Ashleigh that for the first time, he will be working on Mother's Day.

     Although, he wasn't sure she would even be bothered by this. He had barely seen his daughter lately and she always had an attitude when they were together. He brushed this off as her entering those rough, hormonal teenage years. She didn't seem to need him very much at all anymore. She'd probably rather go out with her friends today than spend the day with him. Still, even though he felt she'd be fine, he still was not prepared to tell her he was working today.

    Ashleigh peeped her head through the patio door, "Daddy, come on, breakfast is ready!" He slightly shocked to even hear that she had made breakfast today, but the true shock came when he entered the kitchen and saw the quality of food she had cooked. She had a plate sitting for him with an Eggs Benedict in the center and toast on the side. She had also filled him a small bowl with fruit and prepared a piping hot cup of his favorite coffee.

     "I didn't have a chance to get you a gift, but I got some flowers!" She greeted him with a bear hug and he gently kissed her forehead, his eyes welling up a bit. "This is more than enough darling! I'm happy to just have a chance to get to talk to you for a while..." He sat and ate his breakfast being mostly silent. He simply listened to his daughter talk about school and her friends.  He had never been more happy to hear about silly high school antics and drama, but the perfect breakfast came to a halt when she noticed his bag by the door.

     "Are you working today?! This is supposed to be our day! All you do lately is work, you can't even give me your time for this one day?!" She stormed to her room and slammed the door behind her, giving him no time to even respond. He thought she was distancing herself from him because of teenage hormones, but from her perspective, she was hurt. Her father had been her best friend, but it seemed that his work had overshadowed her lately. She was pulling away out of anger and sadness.

     He knocked at her door pleading for her to open it and talk to him, but she didn't budge. He ran out of time. He was going to be late. In one last ditch effort to make amends he said, "I'm truly sorry Ash, it's just for today. We can go out tomorrow or another day. I promise, I will make it up to you!" and with that, he was out the door and off to film.

     He was hours into filming for Something the Lord Made when his cell phone rang. It was his lawyer. "Alan, I'm going to make this very long story short... Makenzie has filed a petition with the courts asking for visitation rights for Ashleigh. She has provided proof of rehab and sobriety and even a university degree she recently received. Unless Ashleigh strongly protests this, I don't see them denying the request since the courts tend to side with a child having both parents in their lives whenever possible. I believe they will grant her supervised visitation. You will get an order in the mail to appear in court, but I thought I would give you a heads up." Alan slammed the phone down without responding and citing a family emergency, left the set early. Things were about to change and he wasn't prepared in the slightest.