late nights

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Hermes: if you work on a farm and your job is to take care of chickens are you a chickens tender 

Apollo: *staring at the celling with bloodshot eyes at 3 am

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Hades: *nudges Persephone awake at 4am* do you like me 

Persephone: i married you

Hades: yes but did you marry me as a friend or like a wife? unclear

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Persephone: im at a loss of words

Hades: *narrating* in spite of being at loss for words she yelled at hades for the next 25min

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Apollo: what's the first thing you notice when a man approaches you

Artemis: the audacity 

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(in a horror movie)

Aphrodite:  hello

Killer: i see you

Aphrodite:......

Killer:......

Aphrodite: do i look good

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Hades: what's the weirdest place you've ever had sex

Zeus: i dont think you're pathologically prepared for this talk  

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Artemis: if spiders were the size of cats would they be less scary or more scary?

Artemis: because on one hand they wouldn't get into your house easily but on the other hand once they're in there ohhh boi oh boi

Athena: *faiths*

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Hades: *stroking Persephone's hair* you're so tiny and adorable 

Persephone: i could kill you in your sleep

Hades: *with love in his eyes* i know 

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Hermes: i had this dream that gummy bears were trying to eat me so when i woke up i ate some in revenge

Artemis: WHAT THE FUCK

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Poseidon: let us in

Hades: no *slams the door*

Poseidon & Zeus: *singing terribly* HELLO FROM THE OUTSIDE

Hades: *opens the door* shut up and i will let you inside 

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Persephone: honey why are you making chocolate pudding at 4 in the morning 

Hades: because i've lost control of my life 

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