A Wrinkled Tale: From Delta, To River. ✔

iv.

It was midnight when he sneaked into the kitchen and from, bringing out the empty vessels to make up whatever he could make with currently available ingredients, things like- mushroom, rice, curd... he tried to prepare everything as quietly as possible.

Iresh started getting interested in cooking because of his mother, "A dish is lifeless if you don't pour your heart into it. People will not love it if you don't love making it." His mother had told him once. He loved to see her patience and attention while doing so and how she would adjust according to whoever is eating. 

Cooking was the way for him empty out his feelings, while cooking he could always try different things and it felt like the only thing he could do for others, even if his flavors often got overlooked by the fact that he was a boy and he's often left with a hope that everyone enjoyed eating it as much as he enjoyed making it.

Hope: an emotion he thought he suppressed, but he was proven wrong when he met Nile.
 
He now hoped to get to know him- the boy who is rough around the edges and to break through his unwelcoming cold surface and he was brave enough to let that outer ice melt away and underneath somehow he managed to find someone equally emotionally starved as himself, not waiting to be rescued but afraid and desperate to lean on someone.

Irseh does not regret it, getting to know Nile. He has fought so hard not to regret the decisions and events related to Nile, he would not start now. He knew what he was stepping towards and willingly, he fell regardless. 

Maybe it was the excitement in the tension, that anyone could stumble across them wherever they meet or the acknowledgement that this will end as soon as it began. 

"Just tell them to shut up sometimes," Nile said, throwing a twig at Iresh as he walked towards him.

"Easier said than done and it's fine they are only saying that for my betterment-" 

"Stop- I've heard them, you just make an easy target as you don't tell them to mind their own damn business... either that or just don't take them seriously." 

"I can ignore them, but not my own father." Iresh shrugged, patting the space beside him for Nile to sit.

"Well... you weren't born to build a castle on the sun or something, you can figure your own way, you are not obligated to do whatever they expect."

Nile allowed him to see himself in a better light, his relentless, subtle words of encouragement and praises grew on him like moss on a tree, slowly but surely wrapping around him. But it was all scraped out after one cold day.

Iresh found himself next to Nile in their usual visiting place near the mill, amid the soft golden wheat crops, ready to be harvested. There was no warmth or joy of free birdsong, they were under a harsh and freezing downpour and Iresh listened to his dwelled worries about his father's unknown situation in the sea.

The rain caused Nile's hair to be one with his face, draped effortlessly over the bone structure, easily driving Iresh off the edge. His expression was unguarded and raw, the most vulnerable Iresh had ever seen him, all Iresh wanted at that time was to ease off his worried expression.

The despair his eyes conveyed were colder than the rain, Iresh almost could not bear looking at him. They are always filled with determination now reflected in grief, as if they already felt what was going to happen.

Iresh finally convinced him to go home, at that time he thought it would be the better option rather than going to the shore. He put his freezing palms on either side of Nile's face and smiled, "Calm down. It will be alright." he said and his smile slowly began to mirror on Nile's face as he nodded. 

He could not understand if he shivered because of the cold or because Nile hesitantly placed his trembling hands on his waist, as he looked at him like an open book to read. "Can I...?"  Nile murmured and without thinking Iresh's hand ran into his hair and he tilted his head towards himself and their lips pressed together for a moment like there was no choice.

The mutual feeling felt like rebellion against the weather. Nile pulled away only to push his lips back more firmly, tasting the cold droplets on his lips. But the precious feeling of the kiss and the moment was stolen when the news about the gone fishermen spread everywhere in the morning.
  
Surprisingly, Nile showed up to work on the next day as well but fortunately, the owner sent him back and ordered him to join in anytime after a week at least, knowing he would show up as soon as the weekends and he did.
 
Nile was going through grief and Iresh understood that, so he went in the field, plucking out the weeds as he waited almost everyday for him to show up, for him to need to be held by him through his storm like he held him through his worries, but Nile never came there. 

Nile was never available whenever Iresh was at the factory, not even on lunch breaks. So, Iresh concluded that Nile was participating in the game of hide and seek with him, rather than accepting the fact that Nile was purposely avoiding him. With the guilt growing within him, he stopped going to the mill altogether.

Iresh was not content with what he got, he definitely wanted more. 

Iresh knew why he did what he did. Nile's despairing loss was probably a gift for him, an opportunity to finally reach out for him freedom, he can live for himself now.

And Iresh does not want to seek for things that would not happen.  

All thoughts and complaints got erased from his mind when he heard the kitchen door creaking, his face set like stone and mouth in a grim line as he almost dropped the food he was packing up. He squinted at the silhouette behind the barely opened door.

"You thought you could just sneak around in my house?" It was partially revealed that the voice belonged to his mother.

"I-I was just- hungry..." he stuttered as he only watched his mom walk closer and took the packet from his hands which suddenly froze in sweat, "t-that is-"

"Tastes good," that's all he heard over his heart beating out his chest, "Be back home before sunrise," his mother said in her usual calm voice as she handed him back the packed box, that at the moment felt too heavy for him to hold. 

"I- you know- where am I going?" he instantly regretted the words, but a chill went through his veins when his mom patted his head.

"I don't but then again I'm willing to know if you decide to tell me and like I said, you can not just sneak around or out without me knowing." She smiled heartily.