Checkmate {Spencer Reid}

27

The chapter is probably one of my favorites. Especially the ending :)

Derek's POV
As Fiona slammed the door shut I felt my chest ache because I knew something was going on, of course she would be going through some trauma after what had happened to her. But it feels like deja vu.

I headed to Spencer's room as I ran into a younger man, "Sorry bro" he chuckled as he went to knock on Fionas door, "No problem... bro."

I knocked on Spencers door inviting myself in, not looking back at Fionas door, "Morgan? Why are you in here?"

"We need to talk kid." He locked the door behind him and I noticed he has a dark blue kimono on. Of course.

"What's up?"

"I think there's something up with Fiona." he had a knowing look on his face and sighed, "I know, but I'm helping her through it don't worry."

"You sure about that?" He picks his gaze up from the floor and faces me, "What are you talking about?"

"Reid, after Tobias kidnapped you, you went through a lot of shit alone and everyday I regret that none of us helped you. I don't want to make that mistake again with Fiona."

His eyes soften and he nods, taking a deep breath. "She's addicted to hydrophone too, but I dumped it out."

"Well I think you need to go check on her spence, because i'm pretty sure she just called a dealer to her door."

------

No perspective

Spencer paced in his room, drunk in his thoughts after Morgan had left.

Fiona wouldn't call a random drug dealer to her room. Especially not in a middle of a case like this, it's not her. But do I even know who she really is? I barely know anything about her. She said she wanted to get better, she's going through recovery.

But as he continued to think, he only thought of all the times he had relapsed and not told anybody about it. All the times he felt alone and let a drug accompany him on lonely and sad nights, when he had lashed out on Emily just like Fiona had on Sofia.

He took a breath and walked quickly out his door to Fionas room, knocking twice, then again when she didn't answer. He heard small footsteps heading towards the door, "Who is it?" a timid voice said,

"It's me Fiona. Please open the door."

He heard a small metal click and let out a sigh of relief as he saw the door open, but get his chest tighten again as he took in the sigh in front of him.

There Fiona was, in a huge black sweater, her hair a mess and mascara running down her face. She had a bottle of vodka in her hand and socks on her barely covered legs. She said nothing as she turned around and walked into the room, leaving the door open for Spencer to follow her.

"What are you doing here?"She said, sounding disinterested as her words slurred and she popped herself on the small couch. "Are you drunk?"

She took a swig of the bottle and smiled "You are one hell of a profiler Dr.Reid"

He sat down next to her, grabbing the bottle and putting it on the floor, earning a whine of annoyance coming from Fiona. "Why have you been acting like this the last couple of days? It doesn't seem like you."

"What, you got me off one time and automatically think you know me?"

Spencer ignored the sting in his chest as he tried to remind himself she was drunk, and probably high. grabbing her right arm he pulled up the sleeve to see new small bruises on her inner arm and he winced at the sight.

"I thought you said you didn't have anymore."

"I technically didn't. I got some more."

He shook his head but understood how recovery was never a straight line. "Come here." He put his arms under her legs and around her back carrying her bridal style towards the bed and propped her under the covers. She was high out of her mind and disorganized but still let Spencer handle her, completely trusting him.

"Can you stay?"

He turns around nodding, pulling his shirt and work pants off and sliding into the covers next to her. To his surprise she immediately lays her head onto his chest and wraps her arm around his waist, "I always seem to sleep so terribly without you." She whispers, almost talking to herself.

"I know the feeling."

He doesn't want to get hurt. He doesn't want her to get hurt. But he knows that during this time, he can't be with her, recovering addicts aren't supposed to be in relationships. Although he can't say this is a relationship, she's right, they might have fooled around a bit here and there but that doesn't mean their a couple.

He cares so deeply for her, the same feeling he had for Maeve. When Fiona was taken all her could think about how he didn't want history to be repeated. How he would quit his job at the bureau to be with Fiona, because knowing they would be together is all he would need for contentment.

The small moments they had on a balcony on one of their first cases together, how she had opened up, even if it was just for a second. How he soaked up that small amount of information she had given him, how he had learned she smoked because of her dad. Because she feels closer to him like that.

The moments they had spent the same bed together, how he had treated her terribly because he cared about her, and that scared him.

He hated being scared.

He hated not knowing the answer to something.

He hated not being able to figure out what's going to happen next.

He hated the way everything felt so lonely without her.

He hated how his mood drops every time she isn't with him.

But one thing he hates the most,

is how much he's grown to love her.

He wasn't supposed to move on this fast, he was supposed to be with Maeve, he thought.

But thinking back, Maeve might have been his first love.

"But I think you might be my last, Fiona."