Jealousy Is An Ugly Colour

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Vivian's POV

Lately things have been crazy. Jongin and I are not speaking right now, something about me "stressing him out" or whatever. Sorry, I just wanted help with Aera. But okay.

I reconnected with Jennie. Things won't be the same as they were before, but I'm hoping that something can be salvaged.

And I've made a new best friend, and I've been chatting with him almost nonstop. Josh is honestly one of the best people I've ever met. He was a huge inspiration to me when I was younger, and now he's one of my closest friends.

People think it's odd that a 25-year-old K-Pop singer and a 35-year-old Canadian pop/rock star are friends. But I don't think it is. I mean, we have a lot in common, and he's just easy to talk to.

We both struggled with eating disorders and our dreams of making music seemed so far away and impossible. Also, Josh is hella talented and I am so lucky to be able to call him my friend.

Right now, I've been out in the city with Sooyoung and Aera. I haven't been able to physically see my members throughout 2020, so I'm trying to make up for lost time.

"Viv? What's on your mind?" Sooyoung poked my shoulder.

"Huh? Nothing. I'm just really tired. I stayed up late last night." I yawned, pushing Aera's stroller.

"Talking to Josh?" She questioned.

"We've been talking about music stuff. He's been working on some stuff and I've been learning from him. I really love talking to him." I smiled thinking about it.

"And how does Jongin feel?" She nonchalantly brought up my husband.

"What?" I turn to her confused.

"Does he mind that you spend so much time talking to Josh?"

"I don't talk to him that much. We text everyday and call like once a week. Even so, if it bothered him, he would tell me. Not like he needs to worry about anything, I'm not gonna leave  him for Josh. Josh is happily married and his wife is amazing." I scratched the back of my neck.

"How often do you spend time with Jongin?" She continued to ask me.

"Whenever I can, and whenever he'll let me. I spend more time with Jongin than Josh, and that's a fact. But I probably spend more time with Aera than both of them combined." I chuckled at the end and looked down at my smiling daughter.

Sooyoung chuckled too. The sounds of both of our laughter caused Aera to laugh as well. The sound made my heart melt, always had and always will.

"I've been thinking about asking SM if I can go to Vancouver for a little bit when things calm down and work a bit with Josh and the guys." I piped up.

"Will you bring your family?" Sooyoung fixed her sunglasses.

"Only if they want to. I really want to bring Aera, I hate being away from her for extended periods of time. And I would love to bring Jongin, just because I always wanted to travel together."

"Okay..." Sooyoung trailed off.

"What?" I turned to her.

"Do you think he's jealous of the attention you give Josh?" She suddenly stopped on the sidewalk.

I froze and pondered for a minute.

He shouldn't be. He knows I love him, and that he's my number 1 (other than Aera). I only talk to Josh when I have free time and not spending time with anyone in particular. Jongin knows that if I do something that makes him feel awkward or uncomfortable, he can tell me. But I don't see why he would be upset over me having a friend. Not like I'm cheating on him. Josh lives in Vancouver, is married to Amanda, and is 10 years older than me.

There's nothing for him to worry about.

"If he is, he shouldn't be. There's no reason for it." I simply stated, staring ahead of us.

"That doesn't mean that he isn't." Sooyoung placed a hand on my elbow.

"Oh well. I'm not going to let my husband dictate who I can and can't be friends with. Josh hasn't done anything, and it's always been a dream if mine to know him. Jealousy is an ugly colour, and Jongin knows that."

And we left it at that.

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