TO ALL THE BOYS EVER AFTER

ch. 1- dreams

LJ POV

    As I look out the window all I see is Peter, Peter, peter- how we used to go to the diner and get those strawberry pancakes with whipped cream which were peters favorite. Every time I think of something it could be anything it somehow reminds me of Peter. I miss home. I miss Trina, dad, peter, Margot, and Katherine. I get a call from Peter and think to myself he is the love of your life, with his sexy hair and smile I pick up and I say " Hey you!  How is your day going so far? Did you beat Berkley?" then I wait about 5 seconds no answer, 10 seconds still no response just when I am about to say "are you still there?" He says" Laura Jean I can't do this anymore, I love you but I can't trust myself and you to not be having affairs with other people.  I thought we could have a long distance relationship but we have to break up . We can still be friends though if that's cool with you? " There it is again silence.

    I wake up panicked it was my first night in my dorm. Must have been a nightmare, I hear my alarm go off 30 seconds later. I get out of bed, pour some cereal and almond milk into my bowl. I flop back in bed wondering why life is unfair, I have to worry about college, I am constantly having nightmare's, and I can't figure out if the nightmare's are a sign. Then I think to myself you are have an amazing life- you have a loving boyfriend that would do anything for you, you are in an amazing college, and you have friends that would support you no matter what. I look at the clock and its says 10:20. I freak out and say "Oh my god, no no no this cannot be happing" I run into the shower which is cold because I don't have the time to wait a long 3 minutes to have hot water. I already ate so maybe it's not impossible to do this in 5 minutes. I run out of the shower and put clothes on as fast as I can, I brush my hair, and put it in a braid. I sprint to my car, finally I'm on the road. I smell the air let's just say it is NOT my lucky day because I forgot to brush my teeth, of course, I smell terrible. I was in such a hurry. Maybe todays not so bad because I have a expired tic-tac left from my flight. I make it to class 6 minutes late, but I manage to sneak in without Mr. Cooley noticing.

PETER POV

  I drive home from Lacrosse practice . I can't help but think about how close yet far apart me and Lara Jean are. She hasn't called me in 2 weeks, maybe she has a boyfriend and I was replaced or maybe has more important priorities and I am just not good enough, or maybe I am just overthinking this whole situation and she is busy doing other important things. But either way I need to trust her but then again here I go should I break up with her and be with Kylie? I think to myself this long distance thing was never going to work in the first place you are in Stanford and she is in NYU. She said it herself she fell in love with the city. She didn't choose you, she choose NYC. I have to decide how to tell her.. I finally decide I have to be the bigger person. On top of that have to be that person who breaks up in a text, that way I don't have to hear her response out loud. As I reach to grab my phone I go down memory lane. We had some good times together. Like when we used to go to the diner and get those strawberry pancakes with whipped cream- those were the best, how we used to ride the roller coaster and how we would scream so loud that it would make our ears hurt, when she came back with the lock from Korea so we could put in on together someday, how we used to share cotton candy and get it all over our faces, and make-out in the hot tub. I say to myself "You're doing the right thing, it will be the best thing for both of you"

  I wake up alarmed to my phone buzzing at me. It must have just been a dream. I check my phone for any texts just to be sure I didn't text any of that stupid stuff to Lara Jean. My phone buzzes at me again, suddenly there is a loud noise I look down at my phone just as I am about to get out of bed I turn to the side to see that my clock says it's 10:49. I say "Holy Crap, I was supposed to be in class a hour ago. I quickly run into my closet, grab pants, and a shirt. Sprint into my kitchen shove a pop-tart into my mouth, then sprint to the door to grab my shoes.