You only die once

Chapter 5B Possessions over lives, or lives over possessions

Chapter 5B

Possessions over lives, or lives over possessions

I do hold on to my possessions even today. But no longer with the vigour I used too. I hate to judge, but at times, I can't really help it.

The same paediatric oncologist related this to me.

A young boy suffered from acute lymphoblastic leukaemia with 80% chance of survival. The family came together and started treatment. They were a family of four. Parents and two children. He was just three years old, the elder of the two siblings. There were a few extended family members. They had flown into the city from the neighbouring country for treatment. After a month, he was well enough to return home after his first treatment. His leukaemia was in remission when he went home. Two months later, he died in his home town from complications of the treatment. His father came back and thanked my friend. He also broke her heart at the same time. Apparently, he felt the treatment given in their home country was not equal to what had been given in her centre and that probably led to his demise. He said they really wanted to come back but just could not find the money. He had sold the house they lived in and the school bus he drove to earn money. There was nothing else he had of value to sell. He had borrowed money. They had moved in to his brother's home and lived in a room. He said they could work again and get back on their feet but will never get back their son.

She was heartbroken that day and has not forgotten that day. That is why she tries so hard to guarantee payment for treatment of her patients whom she could help.

She was shocked and realised that in another country where healthcare is not free, many do not get the care they need. But the irony of it is, they seemed much better people than us. They value life more than anything else. Certainly, more than possessions.

In my country, we are actually blessed with the availability of free basic health care for all. Leukaemia, especially in children, is treated for free. Even though free, there is a lot of expenses other than medicine and healthcare. Cost of transportation. A parent has to stop working to care for the child. A place to stay as the distance from home to hospital is too far.

This next story is real. And a salute to all the parents who care for a sick child.

I met him in a Grab car coming home from the airport at 10 pm. He was a joyful person. Full of life and passion. We chatted and the conversation drifted to his child. He was diagnosed with acute leukaemia at four years old. They stayed in another state. There was no specialist there. He worked in another state 300km away. His boss was kind and gave him a bonus when he was informed of his child's sickness. He offered him three months' paid leave. But he could not accept it as he had to take at least a year or more. His wife was a kindergarten teacher, if I am not mistaken. Memory fails me nowadays. He quit his job and returned home, took his kid and wife to the city for treatment. He was full of praise for the paediatrician who cared for his child.

"Few words," he said, "she spoke," but the actions and care were beyond his expectations. He used up all his savings in the first four months. Now it was nearly a year into treatment. His child has done well and was admitted for treatment for fever and infection. As he was driving, his wife texted him to get his son's favourite food. Some nuggets, I think. He said he will do that after dropping me. I asked how he was coping and where was he staying. What he said next nearly put me in tears.

He was living out of his car. His 10-year-old Proton. He would shower in the public toilet in the hospital. Wake up early at 5 am and get the first jobs for Grab. He said that the money was the best in the early hours as there was a surcharge. He had the freedom to be there for his son whenever he is needed. He would drive the whole day, stopping at the hospital during visiting hours. Catch a nap when there were no Grab calls coming in. He didn't want to waste the money to rent a place. It would also mean less time for him to be with his family at the hospital if he had to travel from his rented place. He had been doing that for the last six months!

He was a resourceful man. I really admire him. He and a few of the parents he met in the ward had already started a support and help group. Among them, they help each other and new parents.

There are good people. There are always good people. People who value life as it should be. I gave him a huge tip. He said he didn't say all those things to get a tip. Nevertheless, I insisted he took it. Only then did I reveal I am a doctor and I knew the paediatrician who was treating his son.

The following day, I sent a load of WhatsApp texts to her, telling her how valuable she was to her patients and their families. I do hope that made her day. 

Stay tuned. Chapter 6 will be up by 5th March 2021. Hope the journey into my perspective of life is an enjoyable and meaningful one. 

Opps. 🤦🏽‍♂️🤦🏽‍♀️ I forget there is Chapter 5C. My brain must have been screwed up after my near stroke. Please continue with Chapter 5C in the next part.  🙇🏽‍♀️🙇‍♂️ 🙏🏼🙏🏼