part 4 of finding myself

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hey,
It's week 4 and i'm still searching
i'm stuck on earth wandering around between all those people and nothing's happening as it's supposed to.
I feel trapped watching all those miserable depressed horrifying people and thinking that i might be them i will never know.
I tried to stop a girl from throwing herself out the window and i pushed so hard but i'm useless
Air has never stopped a girl from suicide before, what was i thinking even trying to.
This world is scary .. i don't wanna be one of these people soo sad and desperate. I used to be so scared of the image of monsters that i built in my head when i was a kid but i'm just realizing that humans are the real monster.

"There's no running away from those things that hold you down" - that's what the girl said before throwing herself

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