Offering Him Satisfaction

Chapter 4

THIS CHAPTER IS R-18! SPG CONTENT AHEAD! READER DISCRETION IS ADVISED!

CHRYSAN

"I'll be out of the country for a week. I'll message you once I get back." Fabian said before I left his condo. Magiging busy siya sa trabaho niya.

Habang red light, napahawak ako sa dibdib ko. Ano ba itong nararamdaman ko? Why do I feel so high and ecstatic? Maybe because this feeling is so foreign to me.

I need to remind myself that the concert wasn't a date at all! Or else, aasa lang ako sa wala.

I hate boys, remember? I keep on reminding that to myself!

Sa totoo lang, hindi ko alam kung kailan matatapos ang agreement namin ni Fabian. Ang usapan kasi namin, kung kailan siya magsasawa saakin. Magsasawa ba siya kaagad? Siguro oo, dahil marami na siguro siyang karanasan. Hindi ba't ayos iyon? Dahil ibig sabihin saglit lang ang agreement namin.

I sighed heavily before driving. I should clear my mind. I should not add meanings to the concert date. And it wasn't a date, okay!?

"Argh! I'm going crazy!" I cursed myself before driving.

Nakakairita! Bakit ba ganito ang nasa isip ko? Bakit ba ganito ang nararamdaman ko?

Siguro kaya ganito ang nararamdaman ko dahil matagal tagal na rin akong hindi nakapag relax. I've been so stressed these past few weeks.

I woke up feeling refreshed. I attended my online job and started with my day. Wala na ang driver at mga kasambahay namin. I just gave them extra cash. Naintindihan naman nila ang sitwasyon ko kaya malaki ang pasasalamat ko sakanila. Masakit man saakin na tanggalin sila sa trabaho pero kahit ako ay walang wala na rin talaga. After eating breakfast, I decided to go to the cemetery to visit my parents.

My parents' last wish was to bury them immediately. Ayaw nilang may bumisita sa lamay. Huling habilin nila iyon saakin.

My parents' mausoleo is small but it's really nice and a little inexpensive. Isa rin ito sa mga habilin nila.

I looked at their tombstone and sighed deeply. I wanted to cry but there were no tears flowing out of my eyes. I've been so tired crying and grieving. Ubos na ubos na nga talaga siguro ang mga luha ko.

"Hey, mommy. I'm doing fine now.. Do not worry about me." I started speaking as if my mom would answer me. "I miss you both so much.."

"I love you both even though you did bad things in the past... trust me, forgiving you was hard but losing you was way harder." My chest tightened. "I met a man and he has been a huge help to me. He helped me pay bills and loans... I can't say if he's a great guy but he has been a good help.. Do not worry about me, I am not a kid anymore. I know what I'm doing.. Kaya ko po ito."

I prayed a silent prayer before leaving. I'm glad that I did not cry.. I thought I'd cry again but no. I'm proud of that achievement.. Ibig sabihin, tanggap ko na talaga ang mga pangyayari.

Days have passed and it felt normal, not until I received a text message from Fabian. Telling me that he's back and that he wanted to see me.

Text Message from Fabian Alessandro St. Mantovani:

Be ready. I'll see you in my condo.

I replied 'Okay'. I sighed before taking a shower. I made sure to clean myself. I scrubbed my whole body and sprayed my perfume. I dried my hair with a towel and blower. I wore a white off shoulder cropped top and high waisted jeans. I completed my outfit with my black strappy heels. I grabbed my old YSL sling bag and left the house. I texted Fabian that I am on my way but he did not reply.